Heart: There was the good, the bad and the creepy. Let's start off with the good. My top two picks of last night are Kristy Lee Cook and Angela Martin. Kristy is just a sweet girl that has a soft voice that made me almost like country music. It’s also kinda cool that she does the whole wrestling kick-boxing thing, I like a girl that can hold her own in a fight.

Collins: Looked and sounded like a safe bet to make it pretty far into the competition. I'll agree that she's interesting. How can you go wrong with a hot chick with the pretty Country voice and a superstar name? That SAID...I don't think she'll win, because her voice isn't as strong as Carrie Underwood's. They pigeon-holed her as a Country singer very early in her audition, and she is simply not as strong a singer. Still, she has the look to go much further than her voice should allow. Back to Angela Martin. I remember her only from her backstory, and have completely forgotten her actual audition...which is a problem. She's ALREADY not memorable beyond the sob story.

Heart: That story really connected with people, though...and emotion goes a long way on this show. Angela really drew you in with her story about her daughter, but then unlike Temptress Browne could actually sing. I am really surprised that Simon was actually nice to Temptress though, I really wasn’t sure if he had a heart.

Collins: I'm glad you brought up Temptress, though. This is an example of what Idol represents to a lot of people. All the haters out there miss that some people don't see it as simply a chance to succeed and make a million dollars...it's a chance to fix a broken life or make it to the top after experiencing great hardship. Miss Brown's voice give away pretty clearly that she was hoping to get by on emotional reaction, alone. But her tears told even Simon that she was going for broke and genuinely hoping to improve her and her mother's lives. It's inspiring...but, as you said, save the check-presentation stuff for the Idol Gives Back special in April. It's a talent competition, and the judges rightly brushed her aside gently. Can you imagine the outrage if Simon had torn her a new one?!

Heart: Let's move on to the ugly part of the night. Can we talk Milo? The “no sex allowed” guy was really strange, and I’m a little concerned that he’s a social worker, because whose lives is he influencing?

Collins: Not ours, anymore. He's had his time in the spotlight...and it's just a complete joke. His lyrics make me want to start a nationwide safe sex education campaign, out of spite.

Heart: Yikes. Mooooving on...Paul the stalker guy.

Collins: Ah, yes. Paula's "stalker," who wrote a sort of love song to her.

Heart: He was SUPER creepy in the eyes, but you could tell as soon as he broke a smile that he was in on the joke with the song, and the judges just didn’t get it.

Collins: I don't think it's so much that they didn't GET it as Simon was sick and TIRED of it. And rightly so. The producers parade these talentless, costumed FREAKS in to clown around for the camera all day for the poor judges to endure. Simon's looking for real talent, and trying to avoid the mistakes made in earlier seasons this time around. He can't be bothered but that kind of thing.

Heart: I think it's interesting that they play along with some of the "freaks," but then there are some of them that they build up and give a big backstory segment or actually dance and sing along with...why some people and not others?

Collins: It depends on the judges' moods at the time, I think. And some people who head into that room are TRULY crazy. They're convinced they should be taken seriously, for some reason. That can grate on you after a while, and it warrants Simon's question of "Did you REALLY think you had a chance?" when a relatively lucid and normal person walks in and proceeds to absolutely stink the place up.

Heart: Even Paula had to struggle to find nice things to say about SOME of them.

Collins: Back on the subject of Paula's stalker, though...he was the funniest thing I've seen on Idol in ages. I laughed the whole time, genuinely. I want that guy to dominate YouTube, he's my early frontrunner for Best of the Worst. Bring him back for the finale, but write the song about Simon next time...and you've got a great Idol Moment! He should be working for Howard Stern or something like that. Brilliant, attention-getting. THAT is how you make the most of your misguided attempt to make it onto television by freaking out the judges.

Heart: True. He could be back. Any other freaks you want to bring up? I want to finish on a good note.

Collins: The Princess Leia-haired chick at the end, Christina. You know what? She HAS A POINT.

Heart: What?! You're defending her? That's unlike you!

Collins: Well, hear me out. I know it's a talent competition...but Idol COULD benefit from a "goofball." Hopefully, one with actual TALENT, perhaps some cute chickie who could be described as "quirky," will join the party in another city. Knowing that Dallas is FAR superior to Philadelphia in the football world, I can only assume that they'll blow Philly away Idol talent-wise, ha ha.

Heart: We'll see. I won't get into the football debate, I'm here to talk Idol!

Collins: Oh, so am I. If you want to wrap this thing up, give us a highlight of the evening.

Heart: Everyone's talking about Alexis Cohen, the glitter girl with the “possessed voice” who appeared to totally freak out on the judges.

Collins: She's bonkers. I've seen her kind before, we're better off without her. What about her?

Heart: At first I couldn’t believe that she flew off the handle when it seemed like they were relatively nice to her, but after watching an interview she had with Fox News it almost makes sense…

(Exerpt from a FOX News interview.)

COHEN says, "When I realized Simon was calling me possessed I realize I had one of two choices. I can either cry because of all the time, money, energy, effort, heartbreak, and energy I put into it. Overall energy. I could have either cried or showed him what possessed actually is!"

Collins: Interesting. Whether or not you believe her is up to you...but I DID think Simon and the others were too easy on her, so...good to hear that they may have given her the dose of reality she needed.

Heart: You're awful. But you do know your Idol. Any early frontrunners?

Collins: Absolutely. The Dover, DE guy, Chris Watson, is an early frontrunner. A smokin' voice and a good look...plus, Delaware star power. He's the one to watch, ladies and gents. ALSO...the non-drinking, no R-rated movies girl, Brook White, is refreshing in an anti-Britney, anti-Lohan, anti-Paris kind of way. That kind of "I'm not a trainwreck" message is going to go a long way this season, I predict. She's cute, genuine and has a good voice. I wonder if people will support the young nanny who sang the cute song about apples and bananas to those kids far into the competition? Simon says he'll pull her over to the Dark Side, tainting her goody-goodiness. I have a feeling she'll be around for many more weeks, and he'll have several chances. She's a good litmus test for finding out how easily stardom can corrupt a person. In any event, Chris Watson was the find of Philadelphia, at least in terms of what we were shown on television. Look for him to make it to the Final 4, based on what I saw last night.

Heart: WOW. A Final 4 call after NIGHT ONE! Ha ha.

Collins: You heard it here first, America. Things may change as we travel to Dalls and beyond...but, I find it hard to believe we'll find 23 people quite as talented. That said, IF the rest of the talent remains as high-caliber as Mr. Watson, I'll say now that this is already shaping up to be the best season in years. No obvious winners, no sure-things, all contenders. We can only hope.

Heart: We'll have to tune in and see. And you can check out our thoughts and predictions here on Idol Chatter every week.

Collins: Several times a week, probably. Anything and everything Idol, you'll hear it here. You'll also hear from Artie Funk, who will provide his take on the highs and lows from Dallas. He wasn't able to make it for this discussion, obviously.

Heart: On to Dallas!

Collins: That's all for now. Until next time, don't miss me too much, America.

Heart: I doubt they miss you too much, Clyde.

Collins: Oh, har har.