 | Collins: ...who, in my opinion, is simply mediocre. He forced it! Constantine did Queen and went home...and it's a shame Joshua didn't have exactly the same fate. He won't win, just too quirky. Not in the good way, either! A HUGE mistake by the judges to start the show. |
 | Heart: I liked his look, but he does a weird eye thing. Plus, he had to sing with his back turned, and he tried to be "good weird" but I think it just ended up being "weird weird." He still made it, though. | |
 | Funk: He was...pretty not amazing! Good energy, and it was funny that the judges made him turn around. Nothing special. |
| Collins: Jones is one more reason I'm ready to get to Hollywood...so I can see Joshua Jones sent HOME. |
|
| Heart: Ouch! | |
| Collins: And I'm not sorry. Please, let's move on to the next singer. Not that he's any better... |
|
| Heart: J.P. Tjelmeland...he auditioned a few years ago with Carrie Underwood. But he's nowhere near as talented as that American Idol winner, and people really have to realize that if the judges say you can't sing and the competition's not right for you...you probably won't do much better if you go again! | |
|
| Funk: I liked the guy with the spinning rim necklace more than this chump! Was he even singing WORDS?! Go away! |
| Collins: People tell him all the time he's "gonna' be famous?" They're MAKING FUN OF HIM! He has a terrible name, and majoring in Music is a huge mistake. Glad he got the big NO. |
|
| Funk: You know what else bothered me, dog, he asked PAULA if he was "really that bad." Just proof that she really can't say no! It wasn't good. |
|
| Heart: I don't know how Asia'H Epperson could still audition just days after losing her father. She's still in shock! I mean, she could barely keep it together, and you could really see the emotion whe she sang. Even Paula had to walk off the set, it was pretty touching, I thought. | |
|
| Funk: Go. HOME! Be with your FAMILY! Your FATHER JUST DIED! She was only mediocre, to me. I was kind of surprised by the 3 Yes Votes, but it was just a moment to show off Paula's emotional side more. |
| Collins: Yeesh. Priorities, much? The judges noted she had a lovely smile, and all I could say was "but she SHOULDN'T be!" She "honked" a bit during her song, not the best, not the worst. Super-emotional song choice, and I simply felt DIRTY watching her audition, knowing she should've just not been there. There WILL be a Season 8, you know, Asia'h. And drop the whole "apostrophe-H" thing. It's confusing. I think the emotion got the best of our judges. |
|
| Heart: I think you guys are being too hard on her. Like I said...it just hasn't hit her, yet. She HAS to be in shock, and was just trying to keep going and doing what she'd planned and what her dad was supporting her in all along. Give her a chance! And speaking of giving people a chance...Brooke Helvie, the pageant girl, looked just like the Classic Dumb Blonde coming in...but, as tired as I am of girls like her getting all the breaks, she did have a pretty good voice. | |
| Collins: She was HYPER-ANNOYING. If she was kicked by a cow in the course of becoming Miss Southern Flordia Fair, I'm rooting for the cow to boot her again. She brings NOTHING new to music, and all she brings to American Idol is another person to boo if she makes it past Hollywood. Her personality erases her same-y but decent voice. |
|
| Funk: I always fall for "doo-doo" jokes, sorry. But she has the Complete Pop Package! She's the anti-hero of this season, I think. She's PURE POP, and may make it further than anyone wants. |
|
| Heart: I got a clue Eva Miller was a little nuts when she admitted she's another Simon Lover! WHY, girls?! I don't get it! | |
| Collins: Here's another one with too much confidence. She couldn't sing or dance well, her fall, fake or not, was over-exaggerated and not charming, and the way she lost her cool at the end pretty much dashed any hopes of the audience feeling sorry for her! Terrible. |
|
| Funk: You know, I don't think it was an act! I believe her. She had confidence and energy, but...the voice? NO. Buh-bye, Eva. |
|
| Heart: It did seem like an act, but she looked pretty serious in the end. I couldn't tell! | |
|
| Heart: Alexandra Lushinton sounded SO much older than 16 when she sang! | |
| Collins: I liked her Sassy Granny high-fiving Seacrest. If grandma's on every week, I'm instantly a fan! But, from what we saw of her, not bad for a kid. One to look out for. |
|
| Funk: I love the old lady, dog! She was GREAT! But let's talk Alexandra -- WOW! I liked her a lot, even from the maybe THREE seconds of singing time she got. I'm shocked that she's 16, she's got a beautiful voice! |
|
| Heart: And then...we hit three rapid-fire No Votes! Michael Gregory looked like Clay did, but he did NOT have the same strong voice! Yikes! | |
|
| Funk: Lame! |
| Collins: Part of a Loser Montage...I don't remember him. Chris Lars was a freak with a poor singing voice and a giant beard. What do people like him hope to accomplish? Do they just want to be on TV, or to be the one who finally kills Idol? I don't get it! |
|
| Funk: Nice kilt. |
|
| Heart: True story...I had my head turned while Jared Wiley was auditioning, and I thought it was an older woman with a lisp singing! | |
|
| Funk: Another possibly-castrated singer this year...HA! |
| Collins: Ha ha ha...I LOVE IT! |
|
| Heart: They talk a lot about Simon being mean, but I don't think we REALLY saw it. I want to see Simon FREAK OUT on some of these awful singers...maybe even make them cry! | |
| Collins: Julie, I love this side of you we're seeing today! You should let the mean streak out more often. |
|
| Heart: Okay, maybe that's a little harsh. But stop HUGGING everyone! That's not the Simon we know and love! | |
|
| Funk: Or at least love to HATE. |
|
| Heart: Exactly! Anyway, next up was Nathan Hite, with the long hair and "I Don't Care" Attitude. I did think he was funny with the spooning...but no, he can't sing. | |
|
| Funk: Forget this kid. Go home and shut up. Stay in your bedroom and keep on singing poorly, you got nothing! |
| Collins: I disliked everything about him. He's one of those "I'm going in and I'm going to take a stand against the big, evil machine, and I'm going to be the voice of all us poor fans of REAL music who hate everything Idol stands for, and I'll absolutely pull one over on Simon" idiots. |
|
| Heart: I thought his attitude was kind of cool! | |
| Collins: The opposite of cool. FAKE cool. Trying to have a smarmy answer to everything, like when Randy said he was 16 years old and the kid goes, "Yep, sounds good." What in blazes does THAT mean?! He went after Simon after a BAD audition of an OVERPLAYED song, and tried to accuse Cowell of coming in with prepared witty remarks. It was OBVIOUS to me that NATHAN was the one who entered with an agenda and several prepared "slams" to hurl at Simon, because he KNEW he'd be rejected and he thought he'd be teh mane to take it all down, to expose the Man Behind the Curtain. Sorry, but Simon SCHOOLED him. And I don't know which was worse...his "Simon can go back to managing boy bands" line, or his attempted "gay joke" that Simon was just "mad he wouldn't spoon with him." Come on. Just horrible, he can't be defended. |
|
| Heart: Let's keep moving, because Clyde's eyes are about to pop out and I think he needs a nap! Amanda Overmyer, the biker nurse!! She can really BLOW, as Randy might say! Really original, but I don't think she's good enough to win Season 7. | |
|
| Funk: You know I usually give props to good hair, but...I wasn't a fan of hers. She's the Tough Rocker Girl this season, I dig it, the judges did it...maybe she's the most unique they found in Atlanta, if not during the whole season! |
| Collins: Not at all. Whenever someone announces she'll be singing Janis, I completely, 100% want them to be her second coming. There was only ONE woman in the history of rock with a voice and a feel like Pearl, and every time...I'm let down. Long live Janis Joplin, and all you pretenders to her crown ought to have realized by now that screaming to music just isn't the same thing. Biker Nurse from Mars was interesting, but...she'll be back on her bike and burning asphalt sooner than later. |
|
| Heart: We got ANOTHER Golden Ticket Parade montage, but we don't see their names or hear them sing. I just hate that! | |
|
| Funk: Yep. More winners we didn't hear. Greeeeat... |
|
| Funk: We did finish up with Josiah Leming, the dude who lives in his car. I like his style! I wasn't against the Yes Votes...he was surprisingly okay! |
| Collins: You know, I'm not sure what to think of him. His "I live on my own and play by my own rules" story IMMEDIATELY followed by the "I'm so alone, life is so hard" sniffling bit...I can't feel sorry for him! Maybe little girls will fall for how VULNERABLE and UNIQUE he is. I don't know. He didn't have the worst voice, but I'm not into his musical style. The singer-songwriter thing is big right now, though. So...I don't know. He could go either way, but I don't think he'll win it. |
|
| Heart: He just travels around by himself, singing at bars and clubs. I was really hoping he would be good...and he can sing, but he's a little shaky and gets a weird, English accent thing going. | |
| Collins: I'm glad the judges picked up on the psuedo-British accent...Green Day's sound has been pseudo-British for YEARS. We'll see, but he's interesting enough to keep on going for a while. |
|
| Funk: He sounds like the dude from Deathcab for Cutie and Postal Service! That's a compliment, by the way... |
| Collins: Glad you cleared that up, because I didn't have a clue. |
|
| Heart: 19 singers made it...AND WE SAW SIX!!!!!!!!! Over 100,000 auditioned all together in the 7 audition cities, and we're down to the best of the best as we head to Hollywood! | |
| Collins: SORT of. After producers stop force-feeding us more auditions...what is this "Best of the Rest" nonsense? I don't know if I can STOMACH it, knowing that the Hollywood Round is next! |
|
| Funk: Peace out, dogs! We'll be back after the Wednesday show, with our take on...WHATEVER it is they put on there! |
***** DISCLAIMER *****
The opinions expressed by the three "FOX43 Idol Experts" do not necessarily reflect the opinions of FOX43, Tribune Broadcasting or FOX.
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