Women who have given birth looo-oo-ove to talk about it. They love to talk about all the gory details, they love to play "top that." Over drinks, on the soccer sidelines, at PTA events eventually and inevitably, there's a chorus of "when my water broke during the board meeting.....I pushed for 48 straight hours....and then my idiot husband....and the baby's head was as big as....."

OK, ok, since you asked. My favorite part was when I heaved myself over the hospital admissions desk and the idiot nurse, in her whiny stupid voice asks, "Are you in labor?" and I say, "No sh-- Sherlock." That was fun! Or some hours later when I screamed, "GIVE ME THE EPIDURAL!!!" And the nurse screams back, "IT'S TOO LATE!!!" That wasn't as much fun.

But my stories are NOTHING compared to what you'll see on TLC network's new series: I Didn't Know I was Pregnant. This series promises to reveal "the astonishing stories of women who conceive and carry their babies all the way to labor and delivery, while never even knowing they were pregnant."

I'm still sitting here slack-jawed. There are enough women to make a SERIES out of this phenomenon?? Are you kidding me? It's been several years and the painful memories do fade, but lemme tell ya, I can still conjure up those backaches and swollen ankles and, well, I'll spare the details here. I can't imagine NOT KNOWING!

Tonight's debut episode at 9 p.m. sounds intriguing: "Nicci, a 31-year old mother of three goes into labor and gives birth at home with some surprising help from her 10-year-old son - and she didn't even know she was pregnant!" This is a woman with experience in these matters!

So you know where I'll be tonight at 9 p.m....pass the popcorn and the Chardonnay.

PHOTO: Photos.com

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As I plan my middle daughter's bat mitzvah, friends and people I am hiring usually ask: "What's her theme?"

Although everyone these days seems to do a theme for their bar or bat mitzvah party, such as sports or camping or ballet, I still think it is ridiculous to have to design an expensive motif that no one will care about or remember.

The theme usually applies to the table settings, the centerpieces, the music, the giveaways (I'm not doing those either) and the invitations. Some parents say it helps them focus their party planning; I think it's a silly extravagance that takes away from the meaning of the day.

One party my daughter went to had a shopping theme. Extremely offensive.

To reduce costs but still make a party that is classy and fun, I'm hiring a DJ and buying some centerpieces. I bought invitations on-line and created an e-mail address for people to RSVP. In this economy, I'm not sure guests should expect much more.

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My 4-year-old son and I have a common exchange when I give him the one-minute warning.

“You’ve got one more minute, and then it’s time to (eat dinner, get out of the pool, go to bed, etc.)” I tell him.

“Is a minute a long time?” my son asks with complete sincerity.

“It’s 60 seconds,” I tell him.

“Oh, cool. Thanks, Mom.”

He’s happy. I’m happy. And, best of all, I didn’t have to lie.

According to a recent Redbook survey, 84 percent of the magazine’s readers said they lie to their kids about once a month. But they’re not proud of it: 76 percent said they feel guilty about telling their child a lie.

As much as I try to avoid lying to my son, I too have been guilty. When the time came to wean him off a pacifier, I concocted the perfect plan: Upon our return from a trip to California to visit Grandpa, I told him we had accidentally left them behind. I got the queue from my Mom, who 30 years earlier turned me off to pacifiers by telling me we lost them outside and then “found” them, dripping in mud. Disgusted, I gave those suckers up cold turkey that night.

Childhood experts seem to agree that, generally speaking, white lies parents tell their kids don’t scar them for life. In fact, those tall tales we tell our kids to foster belief in the Tooth Fairy or Santa Claus, for example, can actually fuel their imagination.

But resorting to lying on a regular basis is not the way to build trust between you and your child and could create a sticky situation if you’re caught in the act. Many kids usually learn to lie by age 3, and most learn by copying Mom and Dad. Best to nip that habit in the bud; otherwise, you might end up with a teenager who thinks lying is perfectly OK.

Here are a few tips from my arsenal of trying to avoid lying to my son:

Explain yourself. Instead of trying to convince your child that the M&Ms are old or rotten, tell him that eating too many of them is not healthy. They don’t make you strong the way fruits and vegetables do.

Of course, it’s important to know your audience and understand what your child is developmentally ready to handle. When my husband and I told our son that I was pregnant and expecting Baby No. 2 one evening, he woke up the next morning with lots of questions.

“Is your belly going to get bigger and bigger and then will pop so the baby can come out?” he asked.

“No, my belly won’t pop,” I assured him.

“Will the baby come out of your mouth?” he followed up.

“Don’t worry. The baby is going to grow in my belly, and when it’s time, it’ll come out,” I answered, as I walked toward his playroom to find some great new toy to take his mind off the topic.

Which brings me to my second point:

When in doubt, distract. When you’re heading to the checkout counter and you want to avoid your child spotting that must-have candy, give her the opportunity to swipe your credit card in the machine. Even better, let her press the buttons! Chances are she won’t even notice those M&Ms sitting there.

It’s OK to say you don’t want to talk about something. Remember, you set the rules. The same way you can and should put a stop to your child eating too much cake, you can stop a conversation nicely and directly.

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It might not jump out at you at first as a kiddie attraction. But kids love trains, and we have one running through South Florida every day, all the time. It's called Tri-Rail.

My nephew Logan Smeltzer was here visiting me this weekend. He lives in a small town in Oklahoma, and he loved the idea of taking the train to Miami.

To get to Miami from Fort Lauderdale we took Tri-Rail, then Metrorail, then Metromover.
All for $5 each, roundtrip.

When we got to downtown Miami, we ate lunch and looked at all the big sculptures of public art, peeked in the library and snapped photos here and there.

We had an awesome time. Like so much in life, it's not about what you do when you reach your destination. It's about the journey.

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Where are you at lunchtime? If you are anything like me, you are sitting at your desk, dropping crumbs into your keyboard, answering phone calls between bites.

We are not alone. Working Mother magazine surveyed its Smart Mom Council and found that 78 percent do take time for lunch....but the majority of us are either eating at our desks or running errands. Some break. We take no time for ourselves to maybe grab a bite with co-workers or spend some quiet time reading with our salad.

This is our problem, working moms. Or is it our strength? We do what we have to do to make it all work.

For years, I told myself that if I take a real lunch break, it just means I'll work later and miss time with my kids in the evening. I was not about to miss bath time or story time for work. Sacrificing a quiet lunch was worth it.

But now as the kids are getting older, they are busier with their own lives and friends. They don't need me in the same way. And I'm beginning to find that I do have a little more time for myself....This week, I've got two lunches scheduled with friends! And I doubt my kids will suffer for it.

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There ought to be a law: Every child who grows up in South Florida is required to go to the Everglades at least once. Period.

The importance of the great River of Grass will probably escape most young kids, but it doesn't hurt to plant that seed early and often.

So we headed west to take an airboat ride over the weekend. This is about as easy an introducation to the Everglades as you can get. Including drive time, you can do it in two and a half or three hours. Our 11-year-old daughter really enjoyed the outing, but we left our grumpy teenager behind. ("That's boring." Whatever.)

We went to Everglades Holiday Park, but there are other options.

This campground/tourist attraction is just west of Weston on Griffin Road, past U.S. 27. (Be sure to go to the website to print out a coupon.) There's a snack stand (gator bites!), a kitschy gift shop and, after the hourlong airboat ride, an alligator wrestling show.

The gator handler gives a little history lesson, and explains why the Seminoles no longer have to resort to wrestling (blackjack, anyone?). Then he demonstrates a few different ways of subduing the very big gator. And, for an extra $5, you can hold a baby alligator and snap a picture. Awwww.

The main event, though, is the airboat ride. Boats go out every 20 minutes or so, and carry 20 or 30 people for an hourlong tour. The biggest surprise? No mosquitoes! And it wasn't too hot either, especially when we were moving over the water. Our driver, Deborah, took off with a blast -- "zoom, zoom, zoom." (Bring earplugs if you are very sensitive.) She slowed down to gives us ecological lessons. We saw vultures and gators and plenty of birds.

This is Everglades 101. It doesn't take the energy or time of a canoe ride out of Flamingo or a bike ride through Shark Valley. We've done that, too, but it's been years. In fact, Erika doesn't even remember Shark Valley (we took the very-informative tram ride and saw TONS of alligators), so we really have to put that back on our list of things to do.

PHOTO: Sun Sentinel/Michael Laughlin

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The sign on the door of the salon hit me like a ton of bricks. "NO KIDS.’’

I didn’t have my daughter with me, but I was still immediately put off.

While I know kids can be loud and sometimes put up a fuss in salons, it’s downright demeaning for business owners to ban them, formally or informally. It’s a salon not a strip club.

As a single parent, you don’t necessarily want to hire a baby-sitter every time you need to get your hair done. I take my daughter with me most places—get togethers, the theater, late-night runs to Starbucks.

I loved that in France you’d see couples dining late at night with their toddlers.

I came across an interesting article the other day that said some moms in Africa couldn’t stand to put their babies in a stroller because the babies felt too far from their bodies.

Yet, here, people expect you to pawn your kids off on baby-sitters and other folks so they can have their adult-only wedding, adult-only birthday party, adult-only salon.

Give me a break!

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This Fourth of July shake up your tradition of grilling and gathering with the family by checking out a fireworks show outside your neck of the woods.

Here are six shows in the tri-county that seem worthy of the trek. If you know of a Fourth of July festivity that uniquely caters to kids and their parental units, let me know.

All events listed are on July 4.

In Broward County:

Davie: Cool off at 10 a.m. with a free family splash pool party featuring a DJ. Plus World War I and II military equipment show, bounce houses, climbing wall and free birthday cake. Purchase food or bring your own; grills and tables available. Country music group Shadow Creek kicks off festivities at 6 p.m. in the ball fields, fireworks at 9 p.m. Pine Island Park, 3800 SW 92nd Ave. davie-fl.gov. 954-797-1163, 954-797-1000.

Get to Vista View Park early to get the best seats to see fireworks displays across Broward County. Bring beach chairs and blankets. Food vendors on site. 6-11 p.m. at 4001 SW 142nd Ave. $5 per vehicle or $1.50 for walk-ins, bicycles and motorcycles. 954-327-8797.

Lauderdale-by-the-Sea: Beach Blast begins with a parade at 10 a.m., headed north on Bougainvillea from Town Hall to Pine Avenue. Join the fun 11 a.m.-3 p.m. at El Prado Park, El Prado and El Mar drives. Amusement park, classic car show, DJ and steel drum music. Fireworks shot off at the beach at El Prado Drive at 8:30 p.m. 954-772-3336.

In Miami-Dade County:

Coconut Grove: The All-Day Celebration kicks off with an old-fashioned picnic 11 a.m. at the Barnacle house. Lawn games, kite-making and knot-tying demonstrations are highlights. 305-442-6866. Scavenger hunt registration begins 2:15 p.m. at Mayfair Passage, Grand Avenue near Mary Street.

Hot dog eating contest happens 4:30 p.m. at CocoWalk. Concert featuring bands Ryan Stone Music, First October, JT4 and Campo Deluxe Jazz Quartet will be 4 p.m. at Peacock Park, fireworks at 9 p.m. 2820 McFarlane Road. 305-444-7270.

Miami: America's Birthday Bash includes 3-7 p.m. Kids' Zone with inflatable slides, carousel, hoops and face painting. The park will be open all day. Fireworks over Biscayne Bay at 9 p.m. Bayfront Park, 301 N. Biscayne Blvd. 305-358-7550.

In Palm Beach County:

Delray Beach: A sand sculpture contest, bicycle and scooter parade, music, food and fireworks. 8 a.m.-9:30 p.m. at the intersection of A1A and Atlantic Avenue. 561-279-1380 ext. 3.

Wellington: A patriotic pool party with music, games and more from 12-5 p.m. at Aquatics Complex, 12165 W. Forest Hill Blvd. Games, rides, face painting, food and more from 6-9 p.m., fireworks at 9:15 p.m. Village Park, 11700 Pierson Road. 561-791-4733.

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If it rains on your parade this weekend, don't despair. Regroup, pack a snack for the kids and head to one of these 10 places for indoor fun.

TODAY: It's happy hour, but not that kind, with free admission from 5:30 to 8:30 p.m. July 3 at Young at Art Children's Museum (11584 State Road 84, Davie, 954-424-0085). Activities, stories, refreshments and giveaways are tied to the museum's exhibit, "Alice's Wonderland ... A Most Curious Adventure."

SATURDAY: Rain? Ice? Big difference. Especially when the ice is indoors -- and free! Glacier Ice and Snow Arena (4601 N. Federal Highway, Pompano Beach, 954-943-1437) will have free ice skating from 1 to 3 p.m. Saturday. There will be music, games and sleigh rides, too. Skate rental is $3, or bring your own.

ANYTIME: The little scientist you're raising might enjoy the Children's Science Explorium at Sugar Sand Park (300 S. Military Trail, Boca Raton, 561-347-3913). Currently on display is "Pattern Wizardry," a hands-on exhibit meant to help kids discover how patterns organize and enrich their lives. It's perfect for kids ages 5-12. Open 9 a.m.-6 p.m. weekdays and 10 a.m-5 p.m. Saturday and Sunday.

Read the story for seven more options for where to go with the kids this weekend.

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I remember two things about Washington Rojas. The first is that we met one time, 14 years ago. The second is that he inspired one of my most memorable opening sentences as a writer.

It could easily have been my story. I remember being a child on the playground behind P.S. 111 in the north Bronx, joined by my friends and cousins setting off fireworks. I held the M-80 in my hand, chuckling as they all screamed at me to throw it. The fuse was getting closer and closer to its target. Finally one of my friends, I forget who, grabbed the firework and hurled it across the empty playground. I can't remember whether it ever hit the ground. The sound and echo of the powerful explosion has never left me.

I don't know that I've ever fully appreciated what happened that day, even after I met Washington Rojas years later, that one time.

Now, I look at my 5-month-old son and his gorgeous little hands. He slaps at my face in that perfectly innocent way babies explore the world around them. I kiss each finger, and I thank God he was born with all his fingers and thumbs and toes. I will do my best to protect him from the foolishness that could so easily have cost me my fingers.

The photo you see here was shot on July 1 by the Broward Sheriff's Office, which offered an annual demonstration on the dangers of fireworks.

I didn't see that demonstration, nor did I need to. I just need to remember the first words I wrote, 14 years ago, in an article in the New York Daily News.

"Washington Rojas used to be left-handed."

Please, have a happy and safe Fourth of July.

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