I’ve tried to avoid co-sleeping with our kids. Experts say it’s risky (see the American Academy of Pediatrics) and their arguments make sense to me. With our first, Alexander, who’s now almost 2, it wasn’t really necessary. I worked nights and was home and awake at 1 or 2 (or 3) in the morning, so I had some energy to greet an infant at that hour.

Then came Rowan. I now work standard (albeit long) hours during the day, so waking up at 2 a.m. interrupts sleep instead of SportCenter. And we don’t have the same amount of energy as we did with Alexander. Raising two kids under age 2 is exhausting, particularly for my wife, who is breast-feeding.

But I’ve noticed a certain 3-month-old visitor on recent mornings next to me (and hitting me) in bed. He’s joined our bed usually after many hours of failing to get him to stay asleep in his. Relaxed and sleeping peacefully, he looks happy to be there. And I’m happy to see him so at ease – and sound asleep – given how frequently he wakes up at night. In those moments, it seems simple: what’s wrong with co-sleeping?

But then I read what the experts say. And it is sobering. “Several case series of accidental suffocation or death from undetermined cause suggest that bed sharing is hazardous,” an AAP policy statement reads. Well, that’s pretty clear. But I know the advocates of co-sleeping, including good friends of mine, feel that it helps parent-child bonding, breast-feeding and sleep. (See a good summary of the debate.)

Here’s the bottom line: I don’t believe in co-sleeping. But that’s not to say I’ve raised any protests when, after a long night of crying, Rowan has landed next me.

And you?