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Shaking the stepfather blues

I'm getting this feeling, and I can't shake it.

I feel as if the girls simply don't like me. I'm probably being overly sensitive, but the feeling has been growing lately. Yesterday was our first anniversary, and the girls said nothing to me about it. They wished my wife a happy anniversary, but I was on the other side of our car at the time. Maybe they felt their well-wishes to her counted for me, too. I don't know. When they reached me, they asked me to get a video game out so they could hook it up and play.

Maybe I didn't do enough. After all, it's their anniversary of being in my family, too. Maybe I should have gotten them a card or something.

All I know is that lately I've felt less like a "dad," step or otherwise, and more like "that guy who married their mom."

Any advice for shaking that feeling?

POSTED IN: Rafael Olmeda (15), Step-parenting (15)

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Just keep being a nice guy, don't try to be their dad or act as disciplinarian (leave that to mom and real dad) and the rest will fall into place.

Maybe I'm not being nice enough in the first place. I mean, I like to think I am, but I have to allow for the idea that they're giving what they're getting from me. Or, more likely, maybe I'm just misreading what is actually normal teenage behavior. Do you ever feel your kids don't like you, even though you know in your heart they do?

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The Transparent Team

Vicki McCash Brennan has been the editor of South Florida Parenting...more.

Joy Oglesby has an infant daughter and a sister 13 years her junior, whom she babies to the now-adult...more.

Rafael Olmeda is a stepfather to two girls, Kayla (15) and Paxtynn (12). They became a family when Rafael married the former Christine Clark...more

Luis F. Perez covers immigration...more.

Lois Solomon covers religion in Palm Beach County for the Sun-Sentinel by day...more.

Matthew Strozier is an assistant city editor, but his real job is father of two boys, Alexander, a toddler, and Rowan, a newborn...more

Anne Vasquez loves to worry, or so her husband says...more.

Daniel Vasquez, the Sun-Sentinel consumer columnist, comes from a large family...more.

Brittany Wallman is the mother of Creed, 11, and Lily, 5, and is married...more.

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