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The Next Step
Contributed by Cindy Kent, SunSentinel.com
The Kid takes martial arts. His idea. He wants to be a black belt. His idea.
But now he’s at a crossroads: there is a component to the process of getting a black belt – he will have to spar. He doesn’t want to spar.
“Mom, I don’t want to get in a fight, I’m not that kind of guy,” he said. “I know it means I won’t be able to get to my goal though.”
“It’s not like you’re picking a fight,” I said. “It’s about a 360 degree view. About applying what you know.”
He asked me why I am pushing him. I thought we were just having a conversation.
I reminded him it was his idea to take Tae Kwon Do. I told him that he has gathered some valuable tools and he is at a portal, a doorway.
The door is open, and he won’t go through. What if that sets a pattern on how he handles challenges throughout life, getting only halfway there?
What would you say? How would you handle this?
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Cindy Kent Fort Lauderdale mother of three. Her kids span in ages from teenager to 20s...
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Georgia East,is the parent of a five-year-old girl, who came into the world weighing 1 pound, 13 ounces...
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Comments
There's a difference between sparring and getting in a fight. Is he learning TKD to break blocks of wood? He wants to be able to defend himself if he has to. Tell him to think of it as practice (for him and for the person he's sparring).
It's like cops: most of them never, ever want to fire their weapon. But they need to know how, and that means they need to pull the trigger. No one gets hurt at target practice, and when it's done right, no one gets hurt sparring either.
Good luck.
Posted by: John R. | January 9, 2009 12:53 PM
I would encourage him to spar once or twice and then let him decide.
My daughter, at age 12, basically beat up all of the boys and girls in her Tae Kwon Doe class in sparring sessions. It was funny but I also wondered if she was going to turn into an MMA fighter. A couple of years later she was about as girly girl as you can be. Let your kid develop at his own pace. If he quits get him into something else and keep the option open to go back.
Posted by: dave2 | January 12, 2009 9:23 AM