Have you noticed a deficit of paper bags at your Publix store? My requests for paper bags in the checkout line over the past few months have resulted in employee sprints around the store to find the few that seem to remain.
The clerks tell me that customers were taking stacks of them to use as garbage bags, so the management began keeping fewer on hand in the checkout lines. I wondered if my store was the only one affected, so I visited a few others in Boca Raton and there seemed to be the same problem.
I asked Publix spokeswoman Kimberly Reynolds if there was a new Publix policy on paper bags. She said no. They do cost a little more than plastic, but the amount is negligible, she said.
"We see offering paper bags (and plastic for that matter) as a service to our customers and are glad to provide a choice that many customers still prefer," she said.
I try to bring a few green bags to the grocery store, but sometimes I forget and request paper, which do come in handy as garbage bags. I just hope my store makes them more easily available instead of making my request hold up the line.
So much has changed since we were growing up. So why hasn't the prom?
The boy still has to ask the girl. She has to stress out until she gets asked and be depressed if she doesn't get asked. The girl still has to buy an expensive, long, tacky dress. She has to get her hair and make-up done. The couples have to pose in pictures (that they will regret 20 years from now) and attend before- and after-parties that require hours of planning, debate and negotiation.
It's sort of comforting that these traditions have been maintained through all the dramatic changes we adults have lived through. But it's also sad. Why should a girl have to wait for a boy to ask her in this day and age? I know some kids go in groups, and I applaud them. There are some traditions that we should keep and some that need to evolve.
Have you noticed the little signs in the organic milk section of Publix that apologize for the empty shelves?
A national organic milk shortage has hit us here in Florida. According to the New York Times, organic milk farmers' costs are going up and they are decreasing the amount of milk they produce, thus creating not only empty shelves but higher prices.
I had been alternating buying organic milk with Publix's brand milk since Publix stopped buying from suppliers who injected their cows with hormones in 2007. I figure Publix's milk is almost organic now. Now I guess I won't have that choice anymore, unless I want to pay exorbitant prices.
I visited a new class and the teacher had us doing up-dogs into down-dogs into up-dogs for several minutes, encouraging us to roll over our toes. I was able to do this for the first time, but I paid the price, with excruciating back pain that lasted about a week.
Now I see that getting injured is more common than I realized. A new book by a New York Times reporter, William J. Broad, is summarized in this article with a great title: "How Yoga Can Wreck Your Body."
So many people invite injury by doing the poses wrong, and teachers don't correct them. And since most of us are sitting at a desk all day, our bodies are not primed for the extreme angles of many of the poses, such as headstand and shoulderstand.
In a class I took a few days ago, the teacher said she was becoming more aware of yoga injuries and urged us not to push ourselves. The problem, though, is that you often don't know you're hurt until the class is over.
My three teenagers are loving this two-week-long winter break, which in Palm Beach County is actually two weeks and two days. They get to sleep late and hang out at home most of the day.
I, however, like to see them busier and more productive. So I can't wait until this second week of break is over.
Many school systems around the country end right before Christmas and come back right after New Year's Day. But in Palm Beach and Broward counties, the break lasts two full weeks, although Broward schools started again on Monday after the last day of Dec. 16.
The long vacation is hard on working parents, who have to find child care, and for stay at home parents, who have to keep the kids busy during a time when friends are out of town and lots of places are closed. Kids also start to forget what they learned the longer the break is. I vote for a shorter vacation the next time our school boards design their calendars.
It is really creepy to know that the killer of the Bochicchios is still out there somewhere.
I thought for sure the police would apprehend him quickly after the mother and daughter were killed four years ago after Christmas shopping at Town Center Mall in Boca Raton. The killer had such a deranged modus operandi: He tied them up in handcuffs and put blacked-out goggles on at least one of them.
A similar crime had occurred at the mall a few months before. I thought he would keep striking. But he has remained out of sight.
I think of the Bochicchios whenever I see the heavy police presence at the mall. There are city police cars and mall security cars all over the premises. Emergency telephones were also installed in the parking garages after the deaths.
But I wonder if this increased security will make any difference if the killer decides to strike again. Unfortunately he seems to know how to steer clear of the police.
My yoga class has become so crowded that I dread going.
That's a good reason to stop going, right? And I have, for now. I'm hoping the multitudes will lose interest sometime soon.
The room is large but more than 50 people have been squeezing in. You have to get there as soon as the previous class ends to find a place for your mat. If you don't, people will move their mats over so you can fit in, but only begrudgingly.
It's a gentle class with several poses that move your legs and arms off the mat, so you end up bumping into your neighbor. The teacher encourages everyone to laugh about this, but no one wants to be touching or kicking their fellow yogis during our moments of peace.
So I am saying goodbye to yin yoga for now and will find another class to keep me calm. I promise to return when it becomes less popular.
This story today confirmed my decision to get patted down at airports rather than get irradiated by people who promise it won't harm me.
European airports have banned body scanners because studies have linked them to cancer in small numbers of people. The TSA continues to defend the technology.
Everyone knows radiation in the atmosphere hits us every day and there is little we can do about it. On top of that, we get dental X-rays, orthodontic scans, cell phone radiation and other potential waves that we can reject if we choose. Radiologists say it accumulates in our bodies over the course of a lifetime.
When I flew for Thanksgiving, I asked for a patdown instead of going through the scanner at Fort Lauderdale's airport. The TSA guard assured me I wouldn't be seen naked; I told him I was more concerned about the radiation. He told me I get more in my cellphone, but called for the female attendant to pat me down. It was definitely intrusive but hopefully lessened my exposure to future cancers.
Publix has spoiled me. Employees in each department say hello and ask if I need help. They lead me to the product I'm looking for. They search the store for paper bags if I don't want plastic. They pack up my bags and offer to take them to the car.
So a visit to the new Aldi supermarket in Delray Beach, a no-frills chain opening several stores in South Florida, was quite jarring. But I actually liked it and plan to return.
Aldi keeps prices low by having few employees, private-label brands and charging for things like carts and bags. As I entered the store, I couldn't figure out why the carts were chained together. I finally asked a customer, who explained you have to put a quarter into the cart, which releases the lock. You get the quarter back when you return the cart.
This was weird, but I did it and went into the store. It was small, about half the size of a typical Publix and very quiet. I didn't recognize any of the brands on the shelves and headed for the grocery section. I found good-looking red and yellow peppers (two for $1.99, an excellent price), apples, carrots, tangerines, avocados, tomatoes and blueberries ($1.99 for a small container; Publix charged me $3 the day before).
I got a kick out of the checkout line. The cashier put all my items back into my cart without bagging them for me. Now that's no-frills shopping!
Aldi, with five stores in South Florida, only takes cash or debit cards; no coupons or credit cards. Returning my cart was a pain because I had parked far from the store, so I had to walk my groceries to the car and then walk the cart all the way back so I could get back my quarter. In a Publix lot, I would have had the luxury of leaving the cart for an employee to fetch.
It's not easy to talk to kids about a man accused of raping boys, but I took the plunge and explained it to my teenagers so they understand what's going on at Penn State.
Beyond the graphic details, my kids seemed more interested in the moral problems the scandal brings up, such as: Whose responsibility is it to tell the police? Why is the focus on Coach Joe Paterno? And why might the whole football program be punished for the leadership's actions?
Most of the conversation focused on what to do when you witness a crime or something that makes you uncomfortable. I can relate to having trouble knowing how to handle these situations: I have, twice, witnessed fathers hitting their teenage sons and froze up as I decided what to do next (the first time, I flagged down a security car; the second time, the dad saw me and stopped).
Whatever advice you give your kids, the key is to keep the conversation going so they know they can tell you when something does happen.
As I helped my daughter write the thank-yous for her bat mitzvah, it was interesting to observe who gave her what and whether they came to the party or not.
Most of the elder generation, meaning my parents' age, gave a gift whether they came or not. Among my peers, most did not give a gift if they did not come. And in my daughter's age group, there were no gifts from kids who weren't there.
So it's up to the individual. As for me, I am more likely to give a gift now if I can't make it, having seen how much our family appreciated every gift we got.
The story brought home to me how schools are deleting any education not related to the FCAT, even if they are skills that are essential for adult life.
I decided to take matters into my own hands and offered today to teach her to sign her name in cursive. I was surprised that she accepted. Let the lessons begin!
Sigh of relief: My youngest daughter just had her bat mitzvah! That means no more Torah tutoring sessions, rehearsals or draining our bank account for a nice party.
After three bat mitzvahs, I've learned a few things beyond the party-planning basics.
1. Seat older people away from the dance floor so they can hear each other above the music. We asked our deejay to lower the music a few times but it was still too loud.
2. No need to order special kids' food. We had one buffet for everyone and the kids loved the bagels, salads, chicken and pasta dishes.
3. Bring a bag or box to put gifts in. I don't think any of our gifts got lost, but we didn't have a good collection system.
4. I gave in and bought socks for all the girls to wear on the dance floor (they all take off their shoes and expect the hosts to offer socks). All the girls put them on immediately, so I guess it was a worthwhile purchase.
5. Expensive party favors are a waste. How many sweatshirts does a kid need? I bought these personalized mints and put them at each place setting and they were a big hit.
The schools may have reached the goal of the new Florida law, which requires small classes only in certain grades and courses. But the law ballooned class sizes everywhere else, including some required classes in high school and the vaunted AP classes, which high schools urge their students to take to boost their prestige.
I looked at the list of more than 500 classes exempt from the law. Every foreign language is there, as are lots of math and social studies classes. Then there's my personal pet peeve: Earth and Space Science, which my high school freshman takes, which has 37 kids in it. How can the state require a class and then fill it to bursting and expect the kids to do well on their beloved FCATs?
I voted in the last election, along with the majority of Floridians, to keep the class-size limits voters had approved in 2002, which require high school classes to have up to 25 kids. Despite the budget problems of our state, I think our legislators need to respect this vote of their constituents.
One of my seventh-grader's teachers monitors every face in his class to make sure each is enunciating the Pledge of Allegiance every morning.
Those with insufficient enthusiasm get yelled at as he details the sacrifices of America's veterans for the children's freedom. It's the same speech every day, according to my daughter, and does not make them more patriotic.
I knew there were lots of lawsuits over students being forced to say the pledge, so I decided to check what the latest developments were. In 2005, a Boynton Beach High School student refused to say the pledge and got kicked out of class. He sued the school district and the state. A judge ruled the 1942 Florida law requiring students to recite the pledge was unconstitutional, but an appeals court disagreed, and the U.S. Supreme Court declined to hear the case. The law allows an opt-out with parental permission. The student negotiated a settlement with Palm Beach County schools that no student is required to say the pledge, but this seems to conflict with the state law.
More recently, the state Department of Education has wrestled with whether kids who have permission not to say it should sit down or stand up while others recite it.
I have never understood the point of the Pledge. It does not make anyone more enthusiastic about being American. It doesn't make people appreciate democracy. It doesn't prevent treason. If you don't believe in God, you are forced to say you do. All the discussions I found online in support of the pledge offer rah-rah patriotism and "if you don't love America, leave it"-type arguments.
So it may be legal to force the kids to recite the words each morning. But is it moral?
There is so much awareness today about celiac disease, the inability to process foods with glutens, including pasta, pizza crust, bread, cake and cookies. People with celiac can get really sick if they have any contact with these products.
Still, I was taken aback when a parent sought assurance that we would have gluten-free foods for her celiac daughter at our upcoming bat mitzvah. Our menu is already set, so I wasn't sure what I needed to do to accommodate her.
I asked my friend Debbie, whose 12-year-old daughter must eat gluten-free. She said that by the time kids are pre-teens, they know which foods they can eat and shouldn't need too many special accommodations.
"You either send food with them, or you find something to eat at the party or you don't eat," Debbie said. "The problem is cross-contamination. You think it's OK to eat the spinach dip, but someone sticks a piece of bread in it and then someone with celiac can't eat it."
As for me, I told the parent we would have chicken, salads and ice cream and hoped these were gluten-safe. I also spoke to our caterer, who said she would be glad to tell our guest which foods are OK for her and even make up a special plate if needed. So the problem was solved more easily than I thought it would be.
Have you noticed your teen has a new name on Facebook? As they start applying to colleges, they realize that photos of them partying in compromising positions are not going to impress admissions officers. So they are changing their names to make it harder for colleges to find them.
A kid whose last name is "Grossman" will change his Facebook last name to something like "Yuckman," or if her last name is "Ellis," she'll change it to "Ellis Island," so she is still recognizable to friends but not to an investigating admissions officer.
I was curious whether colleges really spend time checking applicants' Facebooks, so I asked Naomi Steinberg, owner of Apply Yourself Educational Consulting in Boca Raton. Here's what she said:
"High schoolers will always try to stay a step ahead of their parents. Now they are showing their prowess by staying a step ahead of college admissions folks. Ask any senior in high school what his or her Facebook name is and you will find that they have morphed their FB identity into something slightly peculiar and mysterious that only their “friends” can figure out."
"Why bother with this? The latest survey from Kaplan Test Prep found that 24% of college admissions officers had visited an applicant's Facebook page to learn more about them while 20% 'Googled' an applicant. It is clear that a student’s online reputation is subject to review in college admissions (and in their next phase of life, they will revisit this when applying for jobs). Students and parents should expect that trend to increase."
"As parents and advisors, of course we should be encouraging kids to make good choices and maintain favorable online reputations. In reality, we know we cannot monitor and control every move they make, every photo they or their friends take, and what they have in their hands when the photo is taken."
Steinberg said the seniors' real names magically reappear once they get their acceptances.
Will Florida public officials keep subverting the will of the people? Now Palm Beach County school officials want to start the 2012-13 school in early August, again, despite a 2006 statewide vote that required school to start no more than two weeks before Labor Day.
They got permission to do this in 2010, but couldn't get it in the current year, when school started Aug. 22. As my colleague Marc Freeman's story details, school planners want an equal number of days in the two semesters of the year and want first semester exams to take place before winter break.
These are laudable goals. But in the current school year, school started on a more reasonable date, exams are taking place before winter break, and even though there are 82 days in the semester instead of the desired 87, I don't think you are going to see a big difference in teacher morale or student test scores.
This reminds me of the class-size exemptions the Legislature approved, which also ignore voters' will to reduce class sizes. There are now 500 exemptions to the class-size law, including core classes my kids take, such as science, where they are cramming in 37 kids. Have our votes on education in our state become totally useless?
There was something so sad about the line of cars in the carpool line this morning.
It was about 7 a.m. and the sun was just rising. As I watched the teenagers get out of their cars, they seemed to be moving in slow motion.
They probably weren't excited to be at school. But the hour of the day certainly did not help: Studies show teenagers have trouble falling asleep before midnight because of bodily changes associated with puberty.
Teenagers need eight to 10 hours of sleep but get an average 7 hours and 20 minutes, a Brown University study found. This is no surprise to any parent of a teenager who finds their kid in an impossible-to-awaken sleep when the alarm goes off around 6 a.m.
I have tried without success to get our high school to change its start time but have encountered resistance from the administration. It's no big deal for me because I get up early, but I feel bad for our kids who have to concentrate in class when their brains aren't fully awake.
I don't monitor my kids' TV watching as much as I should. They watch a lot of reality shows, ranging from the "Housewives" series to "The Glee Project."
And the most irritating of them all: "Keeping Up with the Kardashians." I know Kim Kardashian is famous for her sex tape. But on her family's reality series, she and her sisters seem to do a lot of laying lazily on their beds and going shopping.
Until I was making dinner one night and these words seemed to repeat themselves from the TV: "Sex." "Sex." "Sex." "Sex toys." It was almost like the producers had asked them to see how many times the words could be used in one segment. My 12-year-old and her friend were watching, and I told them to turn it off immediately.
I asked my 14-year-old why she watches the show. She started talking about all the intriguing family relationships. I told her to stop recording it because it was inappropriate.
But I realize that even if I ban the Kardashians, the kids can still watch them easily, on YouTube or so many other ways when I'm not looking. And I was right: After my "ban," I caught one of my kids watching the show on her iPod before she went to bed. I wonder what the Kardashian allure is that kids can't resist them.
I have been tallying the costs of sending my kids to public schools. In the second week of classes, I have spent almost $1,000, not including school supplies or back-to-school clothing.
The main cost has been marching band at $800, which includes uniforms and music. But the little costs have also been irritating, including $5 for middle school locker, $10 for high school locker, $20 for p.e. uniform, $20 for language arts books, $40 for high school parking pass and $20 to support the high school science department. Some of these requests were framed as "optional," although most weren't.
We all know the state of Florida doesn't properly support its public schools. We are now seeing the results of this. A Palm Beach County school is so desperate for money it is offering to sell its name to the highest bidder. Unfortunately, this private support, including the money I am giving, is random and may not go to the places where it is really needed.
Despite our state's severe budget problems, I voted in the last election, along with the majority of Floridians, to keep the class-size limits voters had approved in 2002.
But legislators decided to relax those rules despite our vote, and now we are paying the price. My kids' high school classes consistently have 30-plus kids, some with close to 40.
Although most of these are Advanced Placement classes my senior takes, some are core classes, such as science, that my freshman takes, and that are not exempt from the law. I will assume this is a first-week-of-school glitch and the administration will take care of it quickly.
However, our high school does not have a principal at the moment. How's that for good planning by the school district? At first I thought it didn't matter because there are so many assistant principals. But now, with no coordination at the top, I fear problems such as crowding will fester from lack of leadership.
It has become increasingly acceptable to display your underwear in our society. But there's something about a bra strap showing that drives me crazy.
In my teens' latest fashion craze, they are wearing racerback sleeveless shirts, which on the back side show the shoulders and go down the middle of the back, with regular bras. So their bra straps are clearly visible, from shoulder to mid-back.
Are they making a fashion statement or too lazy to find the right bra? I need to buy them clips so the bra doesn't show. But I doubt they will use them; I think they enjoy the sexiness.
I have always been creeped out by the "Planet of the Apes" movies, ever since I saw my first one in the 1970s.
So you can be sure I have not been to see "Rise of the Planet of the Apes," which was released last weekend to sellout crowds.
There is something so real to me about apes, with their high level of intelligence, rising up against us. So many animals get abused in our society; why wouldn't they take their revenge? This possibility has terrified me since I saw my first apes movie and has stayed with me my whole life.
I urged my kids not to see "Rise," but they weren't interested anyway. My husband went without me; he said the theater was filled with men whose wives also stayed home. So I guess I am not the only female steering clear of the coming revolution.
I was all for my high school freshman joining the marching band this year. I thought it would be a great way to meet kids with a common interest as she navigates a new school.
But as our temperatures climb well into the 90s, I'm having second thoughts. In these weeks before school starts, practice is from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. each day, although the kids are not out on the football field the whole time.
I've always sympathized with kids who have to practice under our brutal Florida sun, especially tennis and football players. We hear periodically about kids who collapse. I'm on the opposite end of the heat-toleration spectrum; the only time I'm outside in this weather is when I'm going in and out of my car and my house.
As I was waiting in the examination room for the doctor to see me yesterday, I noticed on the counter a computer monitor flashing pictures at me. I quickly realized this was an advertisement for a sterilization procedure with the trademark name Adiana.
I've seen subtle ads in doctors' offices before __ on pens, or anatomy posters, or mats, or scales __ but I had never seen anything this blatant, tilted right at the examination table, where marketers knows you are waiting forever for the doctor to come in. Talk about a captive audience.
I meant to ask the doctor about this intrusion into the examination room but got caught up in a list of questions I had brought about other topics. Drug ads on television have been irritating me for years; does the commercial deluge really need to invade the exam room too?
As the lynch mobs took over my kids' Facebooks yesterday, the kids asked me who Casey Anthony is and what did I REALLY think happened.
I had to introduce them to the concepts of a verdict, innocent 'til proven guilty and reasonable doubt. They wanted to know about the role of the judge. They wanted to know how a parent could potentially kill their own child. They wondered why this trial seems to have taken over the country.
It was difficult to explain these complicated topics. They wanted answers and certainty, which I was unable to offer.
I would love to know how you explained this case to your kids.
Driving out of Florida Atlantic University after July 4 fireworks, my husband and I saw a woman walking with her thumb out, seeking a ride. Her back was to us as she walked.
We stopped the car and asked if she needed a ride (duh). She said yes, thanks. My 12-year-old was in the car, as well as my husband and me. She took a seat next to my daughter in the middle of our minivan.
She said she had a fight with her boyfriend and didn't want to ride with him. She rambled on and on and seemed drunk. She kept thanking us.
We took her about halfway to her destination. Throughout the trip, I wondered if we had done the right thing. What if she had a gun? Was my daughter thinking we were crazy?
When our rider got out of the car, my daughter said she liked what we had done, definitely not what I thought she would say. But I still wonder if we put ourselves, and her, at risk by picking up a drunk stranger.
My kids want to get near anyone famous, so when we were planning a visit to New York, I asked them if they wanted to visit Carlo's Bakery in Hoboken, N.J., home of "Cake Boss," the reality series on TLC.
The series documents life at the bakery, where owner Buddy Valastro directs a team of bakers and family members who decorate and sell elaborate pastries. Buddy is funny and has a lot of charisma, which has made the show a success and the little bakery a big tourist destination.
We waited in line for an hour to get into the bakery, and once inside, it was packed and claustrophobic. It was hard to see the pastries because of the crowds and I couldn't wait to get out of there.
But my kids were in heaven. Although they didn't get to see Buddy, they got a picture with his sister. Despite the crowds, the employees couldn't have been nicer and got everyone through efficiently.
We left with a box of cookies and cupcakes and a few T-shirts. It was an experience we'll remember, but I'm not sure I would go back.
I got the chills when I read about the death of Andrew Silvershein, the 16-year-old from Davie who died on a white-water rafting trip in Tennessee.
We want our kids to have adventures they will remember forever, and we trust the people in charge to keep them safe, even though we have to sign their lives away on release forms.
I went white-water rafting a few weeks ago and enjoyed the thrill of the twists and turns, colliding with rocks and getting soaked with cold water. We went over safety procedures in detail, but I'm not sure they would have mattered if I was in the same situation Andrew Silvershein was in.
My kids are scheduled to go white-water rafting with their camp this summer. I'm waiting to see if the camp is rethinking the trip. I'm sure the staff is being deluged with calls from worried parents.
Palm Beach County teachers face grim choices, as detailed in this story by Marc Freeman. They have not received a raise since the 2008-09 school year and now are asking for only a $500 raise for next year as long as none has to take an unpaid furlough.
This modest proposal shows me they understand the school district has little money for raises with a $35 million deficit. The school district had offered a choice of no raises and no furloughs, or a one-day furlough and raises for teachers in their first 10 years of employment (so the district can better compete with neighboring counties).
None of these options bodes well for the future of the profession. The economy is unlikely to improve for a while, meaning teachers likely will continue not to get raises. Who would want to enter a field where you know you will not get a raise and will be criticized for the benefits you get?
It amazes me that my kids have gotten consistently good teachers in spite of these obstacles. It shows you become a teacher because you love to teach, not because you expect a lucrative future.
My kids did well in school this year, and all I did was say "congratulations." I get the feeling they want something more tangible, meaning, gifts.
My 17-year-old hinted that her FRIENDS were getting presents for their straight As. I knew what she was getting at, but I did not take the bait.
My kids went to Montessori pre-schools, which encourage love of learning for its own sake, not for a reward. I embraced this philosophy and have tried to reinforce it in my house.
I see parents carrying presents or flowers at awards ceremonies and wonder if I should do the same. I know my kids would appreciate it, but I feel like it would go against the ideas I am trying to instill. Still, I wonder if I am denying them a pleasure they deserve for their hard work.
My 12-year-old announced last night I should not expect any grandchildren from her. Her science teacher's detailing of "pubic lice" turned her stomach.
It's that time of year again, when middle school kids learn about sex in their science classes. It's become an end-of-the-year ritual in our school district; my guess is that few parents will complain because school is almost over.
Still, in my layman's view of this, there's a fine line between discouraging kids from having sex to disgusting them with graphic details of sexually transmitted diseases and conditions, including pubic lice. I want my kids to learn all about these potential problems, but also want them to know about loving adult relationships with a single partner.
I'm sure the teachers emphasize this, and I thank them for enduring the immaturity of middle school kids as they try to engage them in this important topic. My daughter's teacher apparently had enough of their giggling: She made them put their heads down and be quiet to return some order to the room.
As far as I can tell, the month of May has become a time for playing board games and watching movies in our high schools.
After Advanced Placement exams, which are in early May, many teachers seem to throw in the towel. My daughter's school days consist of movies, parties and game-playing.
Her AP English teacher is doing a poetry unit. Thank you, teacher! Thank you! There is still a lot for these kids to learn, even if the all-important AP exam is over.
To top it all off, our school will be closed on May 26 because all the teachers are needed for graduation. Why not cancel the whole month while we're at it?
Can you imagine undercover officers spending an entire year posing as high school students, and all they uncover is kids selling pot?
What a waste of time and our taxpayer money, as recounted in this story today. The officers spent nine months in classrooms at three Palm Beach County high schools and busted 30 kids over the past few days, most for selling marijuana within 1,000 feet of a school.
If I were the Palm Beach County School District, I would not have held a news conference yesterday to brag about this because it is an embarrassment. The officers spent an entire year doing nothing else, and could not find any cocaine, meth labs or Ecstasy sales? With the school district threatening to cut the school police department, I suggest the chief find other ways to prove the department's worth.
My 12-year-old asked me if it was legal to kill Osama bin Laden.
This question left me stunned for a few moments. She clearly knew killing anyone is wrong. And of course, it is. But in this case, I said, the victim was the brain behind the killing of 3,000 people in New York and went into hiding to flee justice, so he deserved it. I felt very uncomfortable saying this, because as Americans, we still believe in the court system as the ultimate arbiter of guilt or innocence.
In the same way, the celebrations over bin Laden's death also rub me the wrong way. They are filled with gloating 20-somethings who fail to see how complicated the world is. Should our culture celebrate death? Isn't that what we criticize the terrorists for doing? I have never before seen mainstream Americans rejoice this way over a death, even if it was of a despised enemy.
You can wrap yourself in the flag all you want, but bin Laden's demise is a time for solemnity, not partying.
My kids are so used to being driven everywhere that any walking they have to do is a hardship.
A walking tour of the University of Florida last weekend spurred lots of whining and complaints. And if we go to Publix and I don't park in the closest spot to the store, I hear groans and sighs. They may actually have to take a few extra steps!
I have been wondering how I got in this situation, and what I can do to get them out of it. Living in car-dependent South Florida has not helped. Most of my kids' friends live in neighborhoods a few miles away; I wouldn't expect them to walk there.
But I love to walk, and often intentionally pick a faraway parking spot to get some extra exercise. At the moment, I plan to keep emphasizing how exercise is a good thing and hope that rubs off on them, even if they won't acknowledge it.
Panic in our household: No turkey subs for lunch this week!
I love bread and so do my kids. It's an unfortunate and unhealthy trait I have passed along to them. So when Passover comes each year, they freak out over what they will eat for lunch at school, since we do not eat bread for the eight days of the holiday.
I set out to look for some creative ideas. This site offered a healthful approach which I know my kids will reject, including egg salad wrapped in lettuce leaves and cheese chunks and fruit on skewers.
I usually make them a salad with a hard-boiled egg and a container of grapes. Today I added in a handful of chocolate chips for dessert. I usually avoid giving them matzo because they eat it for breakfast, and how much of it can you eat? In a few days, I expect the complaints to start rolling in about how bored they are with my offerings.
OK, I can accept that my eighth grader will take an end-of-the-year trip with her grade to Universal Studios. After all, she is ending an era, three years in middle school, and her high school years are about to begin.
But do sixth graders also need an end-of-the-year trip? My sixth grader is scheduled to go to Sea World with her grade in the coming weeks. I am going to guess that the seventh graders at our school are taking a trip too.
School trips are getting out of hand. My eighth grader is going not only to Universal soon but to Disney with the school band. To top it off, eighth grade social studies classes are going to St. Augustine overnight; we declined that one.
In high school, the trips get even more complicated, and expensive. Our high school offers the kids teacher-led vacations to exotic places such as Australia and New Zealand, China and Europe. Obviously there is a market for the trips because they are offered every year. But I have told my kids we cannot afford to be part of this market.
Parents in South Florida load their kids up with extracurricular activities and push them to do well in school so everyone can see how successful they are. For the most part, the kids follow their parents' wishes. But are they happy?
"Race To Nowhere," a new documentary to be shown in five locations in Broward and Palm Beach counties over the next few weeks, explores how the pressure we put on our kids can lead to severe physical problems, ranging from headaches to depression to self-mutilation. The pressure also frustrates teachers and leads to high school graduates who are not prepared for college.
Parents are not the only source of the stress: Schools can also shoulder their share of the blame for putting too many kids in Advanced Placement classes and forcing memorization over critical thinking.
In my house, I've started making some shifts to place less pressure on the kids. My eighth-grader is not going to take any AP classes next year, although our high school offers two to freshmen. And I've stopped asking my kids about how their tests went and how much homework they have. I am trusting them to succeed without my constant questioning.
Oh, to be a high school senior again and not have to take a full courseload!
Our high school offers "senior privilege" to students with a good GPA and enough credits. They can take one less course, six instead of seven, in their senior year.
My daughter, a junior now, has been looking forward to this since she was a freshman. But I am against it: I think the kids should take advantage of every educational opportunity they can while they have the time and it's free.
But that's just me and my grown-up way of thinking. An assistant principal at our school told me about three-quarters of seniors take advantage of the privilege, demonstrating how out-of-sync I am with the teen mindset. I still wish there was a way, though, to get them to want to be in school for the precious few years that remain.
We all feel helpless as we watch the devastation from the earthquake and tsunami in Japan.
We want our kids to feel like they can make a difference in the world, even in the face of almost total destruction. A Palm Beach County mom and daughter have come up with a kid-friendly project that adults can also connect with: Donating one million pennies to the Girl Scouts of Japan.
Elisabeth Silver of Greenacres (at left) is a seven-year-old Girl Scout (technically a second-year Daisy) who is gathering the pennies through April 30. She and her mom, Erin, are recounting their efforts in a blog. So far they have collected 12,845 pennies, her mom told me.
Many organizations have launched Japan campaigns, including Save the Children, American Red Cross and the Japan Society. But I love the way the Silvers have found an age-appropriate way to help kids understand the tragedy.
They have a long way to go to get to their goal of $10,000. If you want to help, contact them at PenniesforJapanGS@yahoo.com or 561-386-9197.
My blue recycling bin overflows past the brim each week with plastic: milk jugs, water bottles, Publix muffin containers, Thai take-out boxes.
Although I recycle religiously, I wonder if it's doing any good. It must take lots of gas and electricity to haul the recyclables, process them and get them to wherever they are crushed and repurposed.
One obvious solution is giving the kids canteens in their lunches instead of the throwaway water bottles. The problem has been that they either complain that they leak or absentmindedly throw them away.
The plastic bottles are just so easy, a nice thin shape that fits in the lunch bag. Let me know if you have come up with good solutions to the abundance of plastic in your house.
As the mother of a high school junior, I am entering the era where the mommy-talk is all about college: "Where are you going for SAT prep?" "You've hired a private counselor?" "You're visiting FIVE schools over spring break?"
On my end, the talk is more about whether to use the pre-paid Florida tuition we bought when the kids were toddlers or to take the plunge and apply to private colleges, where the prestige would be high but the payments exorbitant: $50,000 a year, give or take, depending on scholarships, loans, etc.
I went to a private college; my husband went to a public university. So we could go either way in terms of our kids. From what I have seen in life, the people who went to private universities are no richer or happier than people who went to public ones.
Is it worth it for our family to go into debt to get a name-brand college on a diploma? Does that diploma have more value in the long term? Or does a big state university provide the same education and set of experiences at a drastically lower cost? My research is about to begin.
The time to hesitate is through: Boca Raton's own Brett Loewenstern made "Light My Fire" his own on Tuesday night and deserves to make it to the next round of 'American Idol."
Tossing his red hair with a flaming red-orange backdrop behind him, he chose a perfect song to showcase his voice, style and gentle manner.
I have been impressed with the snippets "Idol" shows us of Brett's personality. He welcomes fellow contestants into his circle, hugs them easily and holds their hands as they walk down the aisles.
This will not help him make it to the top, of course. And the competition is stiff. I've been impressed with rocker James Durbin and the passionate Jacob Lusk.
But Brett is making his mark with his positive attitude and original musical interpretations. Not to mention that gorgeous wavy mane. Go Brett!
When Sports Illustrated's annual swimsuit issue arrived in the mail, my first impulse was to take it to the recycling bin.
As usual, the cover showed a buxom, voluptuous, tanned young thing bursting from her bikini on an empty beach. The rest of the issue showed models and athletes wearing almost nothing or actually nothing; one was covered only by a palm frond, another by a kayak paddle.
Every year, I have this debate with myself. Is the swimsuit edition a "work of art" that celebrates the beautiful female form, or is it soft porn designed to keep men buying Sports Illustrated?
I think it's a form of porn, and it's a shame that female athletes who achieved based on their talents feel the need to pose naked. But I won't throw it out because I don't believe in censorship, even if it means my husband may look through the pages and let his imagination run wild.
I wonder if I am Art Johnson's last fan in Palm Beach County.
The School Board is expected to vote tonight to accept a resignation settlement from Johnson, who otherwise would have been fired. The chief gripe is his hiring and support of former Chief Academic Officer Jeffrey Hernandez, who forced a lot of changes on schools last year in an effort to bring up the worst performing students.
Many of my friends were infuriated by the changes, which included constant testing and a "one size fits all" approach to education. But I took a more sympathetic view. I used to cover the school district for the Sun-Sentinel and came to feel that Johnson sincerely wanted to educate Palm Beach County's disadvantaged kids.
He tried to get the best teachers to go to their schools and improved career academies so the unmotivated could find a niche. He tried many times to tinker with school boundaries to give poor students more opportunities to attend our best schools.
But this desire on his part, however deeply felt, was overshadowed by his strong, some call it arrogant, personality. I hope his successor is similarly moved to pay attention to our neediest children.
There's something about middle school that makes girls want to put on eyeliner.
Unfortunately, they make it as dark as possible and put it above the lower lashes, almost right in their eyes, creating an unattractive line that makes them look 10 years older.
Of course, that's the intention, and the part most parents want to resist. But we may be fighting an impossible battle. The percentage of pre-teens who wear eyeliner grew from 9 percent in 2007 to 15 percent in 2009. Mascara-wearing girls grew from 10 percent to 18 percent in the same two years, according to the consumer researchers NPD Group.
Our girls' insistence on participating in this trendy phenomenon makes for the usual parent-kid argument, and the debate I always end up having with myself: Is this battle worth it?
I have to admit I was glad when one of my daughters got a minor eye infection recently. I made sure to point out her eyeliner probably made its way into her eye. She has cut back on the inner liner ever since.
It was a treat to see our high school, Spanish River in Boca Raton, on display for the whole country to see on "American Idol." But it was an even bigger thrill to watch Brett Loewenstern, a junior and classmate of my daughter, wow the judges with his rendition of the Queen classic, "Bohemian Rhapsody."
On a more somber note, I didn't know who to be upset with as he recounted how he has been bullied since he was a little boy. Is it the fault of the schools? Did his parents communicate with the schools? How many people knew and did nothing?
He seems to have come to terms with it. "I had an epiphany at one point," he said. "I finally became happy in my own shell, and now it's like, [if] someone doesn't like me it's cool. 'Cause as long as I like me that's all that matters."
That is a very mature attitude for a 16-year-old. I am rooting for him to go far in this competition.
Is it too much to ask school administrators to get students' names right during awards ceremonies?
I was at an honor roll ceremony last week and I almost had to cover my ears as I heard the names of kids I know. Alexa was "Alexis." Romero was "Romeo." Braden was "Brandon." Needless to say, last names got similarly brutal treatment.
I've seen this happen many times before and I always hope the administrators study up on the names before they announce them in public.
Maybe they do and still can't get them right. But I would hate to be the parent whose moment of pride was ruined when the school administrator mangled their family name.
There is a very specific style of shorts that my 14-year-old needs to comply with her middle school dress code and still be fashionable. And unfortunately, few stores are selling them at the moment.
They are similar to this photo, but more school-appropriate: Jeans, just above the knee, low-waisted and form-fitting.
Unfortunately, retailers in South Florida seem to follow trends in northern climes and don't carry these until their "spring collections" come in. This is the pattern I've found when I've asked at several chain stores over the past couple of weeks.
My daughter is in a growth spurt and desperately needed the new shorts. So we resorted to something I was hesitant to do: We bought jeans and cut them. I hated to waste the money but we couldn't wait for spring. Don't these stores realize South Floridians have different needs from the rest of the country?
My daughter's soccer team has lost all six of the games it has played so far this season.
This is the source of much discussion in our house, especially as the weekend approaches and another potentially disappointing matchup looms.
On an adult level, the league probably could have distributed the players, who are rated by skill, more evenly. To my daughter, I try to de-emphasize winning, talking about the friendly girls on the team, the much-needed exercise she is getting, the excellent coaches, etc.
But who plays soccer and doesn't care about winning? I'm finding there isn't much I can say as a consolation.
After a vacation of more than two weeks, the kids are finally back in school. The kids are not complaining about the length of the break. But I am.
Many school systems around the country end right before Christmas and come back right after New Year's Day. But in Palm Beach and Broward counties, the last day of school was Dec. 17. In Palm Beach, kids didn't go back until Tuesday.
A two-week break means more time for kids to forget what they've learned. In Broward, students take semester exams after the break, making the lengthy vacation extra stressful.
The long vacation is hard on working parents, who have to find child care, and for stay at home parents, who have to keep the kids busy during a time when friends are out of town and lots of places are closed. I vote for a shorter vacation the next time our school boards design their calendars.
My kids are waiting for me to write something dumb in a text message so they can send it to WhenParentsText.com.
I've been finding them in fits of laughter in front of their computers as they read this blog, which takes submissions from kids about embarrassing spelling mistakes, emoticons, attempts at humor and other egregious errors parents make as they type into their phones.
I have to admit some are pretty funny. Here's a small sample.
Dad: I was just at work laughing out loud thinking about guy on millionaire matchmaker creepily staring at girl with his head tilted. (I’m LOLing as I write this.)
It's been really funny to watch my teens experience our cold weather.
They admit they are freezing but refuse to wear a coat. They wear sweatshirts and even put on the hood, but will not put on a jacket that will actually keep them warm.
My strategy is not to argue about it but let them see for themselves how their sweatshirts are insufficient. They beg me to put on the heat in the car and I take my time, as I am warm in my coat and gloves and they need to learn that no one will say they are not cool if they wear something that will actually make the cold tolerable.
Three years have passed and there is still no arrest for the murders of Nancy Bochicchio and her daughter, Joey, at Town Center Mall in Boca Raton.
I think of them every time I park in one of the garages at the mall, where they were abducted Dec. 12, 2007, after they had gone Christmas shopping. They were forced to withdraw $500 from the bank and were bound with plastic ties and handcuffs before they were killed.
There has been no news for a long time on any progress in the investigation. Last time we heard from the police on this, almost a year ago, they released a photo of the goggles that were placed on either Nancy or Joey (they wouldn't say who).
The mall is filled with extra security now. I see patrol cars every time I visit and there are emergency phones all over the place. But I still get the chills as I imagine what they went through in the same place where I park my car.
You've probably seen them on girls throughout South Florida without realizing they have a weird name: "jeggings," a merger of jeans and leggings.
They are super-form-fitting jeans or other skinny fabrics that are more like tights. They tightly frame the thighs and butt and are hard to get on and off. I am surprised they are allowed at school but I haven't heard of any official objections to them.
I don't love them but my girls are wearing them. I hope this is a trend that fades fast.
Since I am scared of the radiation emitted by the new airport body scanners, I was going to have my kids get patted down when we fly for Thanksgiving next week.
But now that the Transportation Security Administration has changed its pat-down procedures, I'm not sure what to do.
The new procedure uses a "sliding hand motion" on private areas that used to be skimmed lightly. As you can see in this video, the security agent warned this passenger what was about to be done and it is quite graphic.
A protester is declaring Nov. 24 "National Opt-Out Day," to encourage people to avoid the body scanner machines and submit to pat-downs instead to mess up the TSA on one of the busiest travel days of the year.
We were going to do the pat-downs anyway to avoid the radiation. But now I'm not sure I want my kids to get touched this way by strangers, even if it is in the name of the government.
My eighth-grader has been invited by her school to Europe, Costa Rica and the Galapagos.
Her teachers are organizing these "educational tours" in June, when school gets out. The Costa Rica trip is $2,017, the Galapagos tour, $3,549. I tossed out the flier for the Europe trip a few weeks ago because I knew it was not in our price range.
I guess there are families who can afford these trips. But I'm getting tired of having to tell my daughter, each time a new flier comes home with her, that it will not be possible for us.
I can see the schools organizing trips to Disney or Universal. But when did they get in the business of becoming deluxe tour operators?
I know school and voting officials think it was really great that Broward and Palm Beach schools were closed on Election Day. But as a working parent, I take a different view of the many times schools are closed in the middle of the week.
Although we are in the 12th week of school in Palm Beach County, there have only been five uninterrupted weeks of school. For seven weeks, there has been either a Teacher Work Day, a Professional Development Day, a Holiday or some other reason to break up a full week of school.
And now the Palm Beach County School District wants to start closing the schools for Veterans' Day, too. Is this good for kids' education? Is anyone going to take their kids to a Veterans Day ceremony on that day off?
My kids are out of elementary school now, but I remember the days when I had to search frantically for child care on these days off when they were too young to take care of themselves. I sympathize with you, working parents of little ones.
My 16-year-old is getting free SAT prep this year.
It's an honors elective course at her public high school called "Research 1," but it's actually an SAT readiness course, with half the year devoted to verbal skills and half the year to math.
I was thrilled that I won't have to pay for private classes, which can cost hundreds of dollars and whose benefits are unclear.
How much do the kids' scores improve with a class as opposed to sitting down with a sample book of test questions? Is a tutor worth the expense? Is it worth it to bring up the scores by paying this extra money? Do colleges think this preparation has value?
All these questions flow through my mind as we start to think about getting into college and how to pay for it. I'm sure the prep course teachers and tutors think they are worth the money, but in this economy, I'm glad my daughter is getting this knowledge at no cost.
If adults are suffering from neck problems after only a few years of texting and cell phoning, imagine what's in store for our kids, who may start having physical problems much younger than we are.
Daniel Vasquez's Sun-Sentinel story Monday on "text neck," the upper-body problems that come from mobile devices and poor posture, hit home for me. My kids slump at the computer, hang their necks as they look down on their cellphones and tilt their heads to the side as they hold the phone between their neck and their ear as they type.
I tell them to sit up straight, use a headset or speakerphone, etc., etc., and they roll their eyes as I used to when my parents told me to stop slouching. But I think what they will soon experience is much more dangerous and threatening to their future health: painful necks and shoulders, tight muscles in the back and stiff hips, all of which I am already experiencing after only a few years of the digital age.
No matter how much we warn them, I think this is a problem we are not going to be able to fix.
My 16-year-old comes home from school and falls asleep. For three hours.
The brutal 6:30 a.m. wakeups for the 7:30 a.m. school start time have hit her hard. I know lots of kids have to get up even earlier.
I have lobbied against the ridiculousness of these early start times, including meeting with our high school principal, to no avail. There are so many studies that show that these early start times go against teen sleeping rhythms and are associated with poor performance in school.
In the meantime, I have to deal with the consequences. If she doesn't have to go to work or another activity, I have been letting her take a nap. Of course, then she can't fall asleep til midnight or so, and then she hardly gets any sleep that night, and the cycle begins again.
Despite the assurances of the authorities, I am skeptical of the new airport body scanners, which are now at Palm Beach International and Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International airports.
The main reason is the radiation. Although airport officials say it is minimal, I'm the type that avoids X-rays because I believe the radiation adds up in your body over your lifetime.
The fact that some anonymous person is seeing us naked is also disturbing. They say they delete the pictures after he/she views them. Seems like this would be a big mistake if one of us was later found out to be a terrorist.
At the San Francisco airport last summer, I requested a pat-down instead. It was no big deal, and I will do it again every time I approach one of the scanners, where you have to hold up your hands as if you are a criminal.
When my sixth-grader and eighth-grader get home from school, they zoom past me and head for the bathroom.
I chastise them for holding it in all day. But it ends up that they don't use the school bathrooms for a whole bunch of reasons, only one of which is the stereotypical grossness of middle school toilets.
They say they don't have time to go between classes. And their teachers only allow them two bathroom passes per academic quarter, which the kids want to save for "emergencies."
Needless to say, holding it in is uncomfortable and unhealthy. But I'm going to let them figure out how to best use those two passes per quarter by themselves.
One of my daughter's middle school teachers has been gabbing on her cell phone during class. In the most recent episode, my daughter said she took a call from her son, who wanted to know what tie to wear. The teacher went into her classroom office and closed the door, then came out and yelled at the kids for talking.
It's not the first time my kids have told me stories about teachers taking calls during class. I researched the school district's technology policies, but couldn't find anything specifically addressing teachers' use of cell phones for personal reasons. It seems obvious, though, that it's the wrong thing to do.
The question is what I should do about it, if anything. Is it worth a call to the principal's office? Or is this one of those "choose your battles" quandaries that probably is not worth my energy?
Over the years, I have chastised my kids for using the term "boobs" when they mean breasts.
So I wasn't sure what to tell my 11-year-old when she bought an "I (Heart) Boobies" bracelet from another kid at school who was raising money for breast cancer awareness.
It's a clever campaign, sponsored by the California-based Keep A Breast Foundation. Several school districts across the country have banned the bracelets, saying they are a distraction and use inappropriate language.
I'll bet that ban will soon apply to South Florida middle schools. Would you let your daughter, or even better, your son, wear one of these?
My 11-year-old stopped talking to us for a day this past weekend. We refused to let her miss school on Tuesday so she could watch the Jonas Brothers play softball at Roger Dean Stadium in Jupiter.
To me, this was a no-brainer. Academics take priority. But her friends' parents don't have the same philosophy, and they let their kids go. One of the parents took her friends to the game, which was at 12:30 p.m.
According to the Roger Dean Stadium website, the Jonas Brothers play softball with their road crew to make teens aware of the dangers of texting while driving. An admirable public service. I think it's ironic that they want kids to miss school so they can hear that message.
A week after my daughter got a ticket for running a red light, my father got a ticket in our neighborhood for not stopping properly at a stop sign.
To add insult to injury, the officer came back an hour later and gave him a ticket for parking on the street in front of our house (instead of on the grass; this is a Palm Beach County law).
So we have been talking about the police a lot in our household, not in the most positive way.
My kids want to know why anyone would want to become a police officer, if all they do is give out tickets. I explained that they do many other things, such as rescuing people from accidents, performing CPR, delivering babies, protecting us from terrorists.
But these are abstract concepts for kids unless they have firsthand experience. I hope my kids never need to be rescued by the police, but it may be the best way for them to see that law enforcement's responsibilities extend beyond our cars.
Four months after getting her driver's license, my 16-year-old got a ticket for running a red light last week.
She thought we'd be angry, but we weren't. Our neighborhood is surrounded by speed traps and it happens to everyone we know.
The debate in our household was how to resolve the ticket. In similar situations, my daughter's friends' parents have hired attorneys, who get the points off the kids' licenses.
But from what I can tell, working through the lawyer costs about the same as paying the ticket. And you can take the on-line drivers' ed course to get the points off your license. I'm not sure if hiring a lawyer to get the points off is teaching the right lesson.
Have you hired attorneys to resolve your traffic citations? Are you glad you did?
My kids have taken the "Just Say No to Drugs and Alcohol" mantra to the extreme.
They don't understand moderation. They frown at my husband when he drinks the occasional beer. Now that he and I have been getting into wine-tasting, they continue to pound home their point.
"Alcohol is bad for you," my 11-year-old said last night.
I understand that the schools have to give black-and-white information to kids so their message is easily understood. But there are nuances with alcohol: Red wine is actually good for you, in moderation, of course. I wish there was a way for the schools to teach this balance.
I was jolted yesterday when my 16-year-old told me we needed to buy a textbook for her AP Chemistry class.
Fortunately a used copy was only $5 at Amazon.com, plus $4 for shipping. But it was the first time we had been asked to buy our own textbook in our long public school career.
I know our South Florida school districts are experiencing severe budget problems. And we're not the only ones having to shell out money for public school costs. Parents in Chicago are spending several hundred dollars on their kids' texts. But this was the first time funding cuts like this have hit me personally.
My 16-year-old may be the only new driver in South Florida without her own car.
I know there must be some of you out there, who, like us, either don't believe 16-year-olds should have their own cars, can't afford to buy them one or are telling the kids to buy it themselves. I would love to hear from you. Because all the kids I know are getting cars from their parents, some used and some new, as soon as they get their licenses.
I can see the value of kids having their own cars. Fewer family fights. Freedom to get a job, pursue extracurricular activities, go out with friends, etc. It is really hard to get around South Florida without a car.
At the same time, insurance, gas, maintenance and the car itself are super expensive, especially in these lean times. But I haven't seen anyone tell their kids, "Save up your money." The gift of a car seems to have become a rite of passage.
My husband and I have our share of sleeping issues. He snores; I'm the lightest sleeper on the planet. I go to bed early and get up early; he burns the midnight oil and gets up well after sunrise.
I have found this is sort of a taboo topic among my friends. So I was reassured this week to learn we are not alone. Lots of couples have sleep problems. One in four American couples sleep in separate beds, according to the National Sleep Foundation. The trend is so strong that the National Association of Home Builders expects to build separate master bedrooms for 60 percent of custom-built homes by 2015.
That statistic really stopped me. People are even telling their architects about the challenges of sleeping together. Finally this topic is coming out in the open.
Do you sleep with your spouse? What kinds of issues do you face? What do you do to make sure you get enough sleep?
I want my kids to exercise this summer, but I'm not going to send them to play outside in our 90-plus degree heat.
Two Boca Raton women who understand the perils of getting overheated have developed a fun website to encourage indoor exercise for boys and girls ages 8 to 14, using videos and incentives like iPods to make them get their heart rates up.
GetSweaty.com is the brainchild of Benita Appel and Angel Cicerone, who were overweight themselves and decided to brainstorm ways kids could start getting fit early to avoid obesity.
The result: A free website in which the more the children exercise, the more points they get, earning them a chance at a prize.
Their focus groups showed them kids will exercise if they have an incentive, such as backpacks, T-shirts and iTunes gift cards. There is no way to make sure the kids are actually doing the video and not just watching it, but the videos are lively, colorful and fun, and the incentives sweet enough to lure the kids to move the computer chairs over and join in.
Wow. Did you watch "Huge" on Monday night? It was the first time I've seen teenage cellulite glorified on TV, in a seductive striptease by none other than Nikki Blonsky of "Hairspray" fame.
I wondered what my thin 11- and 13-year-old girls were thinking as they watched the ABC Family show, which explores the issues facing teens at a weight-loss summer camp. I asked them and they shrugged. I could tell they couldn't relate, but I could.
The show explores how the kids face their obesity issues. They sabotage themselves and each other by creating a black market in prohibited food and then tattling about it. There's the pretty girl, the sympathetic girl, the rebellious girl (there are boys too, although girls' issues seemed to be the focus in this episode), and there was an interesting balance between their obvious need to lose weight and get healthy vs. being satisfied with who they are and the way they look.
This series has a lot of potential and I'm going to stick with it, although I'm not sure my kids understood the deeper issues at play.
I have always had mixed feelings about the gifted program in Florida public schools. I've found it offers highly stimulating work but is filled with kids who don't belong there.
Kids need an IQ of 130 to get in, which is the top 2 percent of the population. Everyone knows if you go to a private psychologist instead of getting tested through the school system, your child has a better chance of getting in. I'm not sure why, because I doubt there are unethical psychologists out there (am I naive?).
My 11-year-old just missed the cut when tested by the school system a few years ago. She asked to be tested again for middle school.
So I took her to a private psychologist, and of course, she qualified. Although I think she deserves to be in the program, I feel like I bought my way in. It's totally legal, but I still feel kind of seedy and dirty.
I took a similar summer trip when I was her age, and it was one of the most memorable experiences of my life. You connect with the land of your ancestors at an age when it can make a lifelong impression. It becomes an experience you take with you everywhere you go.
There is always a threat of violence in Israel; perhaps there always will be. Hopefully, it will remain peaceful this summer during my daughter's trip.
Kudos to the parent at our high school who called the principal to complain that the kids were not doing any work now that the Advanced Placement tests are over.
My thoughts exactly. I had just made the same comment to my sophomore, who accused me of being the parent who had called the school.
I know the goal of AP classes, which are college-level work, is to do well on the AP tests, which were two weeks ago. But that doesn't mean there's nothing left to learn. It doesn't mean the kids should be playing party games like "Apples to Apples" in class.
It doesn't mean they should be doing busy work, either. The AP art history teacher is having the class make CDs of music that mentions works of art. Give me a break! There is so much to learn, kids, and so little time. Use every minute to work your brains before they jellify over the summer.
That's the headline on the personalized pages of Formspring.me, an Internet application in which you can ask anonymous questions to acquaintances.
Sounds innocent enough. But I am hearing more and more about how Formspring is being used as a way to bully. You can say anything you want and the teen will never know who the culprit is. Many teens are obsessed with being attractive and popular but wonder deep down what people really think of them. The site has the potential to stress them out over which classmate sent over the mean comment.
A Boca Raton family therapist, Tina Connan, recently sent out a mass e-mail warning parents to talk to their kids about Formspring. She said: "There is zero, and I mean zero, value in this website and no girl or boy should spend a minute on it. Formspring.me creates unnecessary emotional risks. It legitimizes cybercruelty and prevents kids from taking responsibility for their words and actions. "
Connan recommends that we start conversations with our kids about Formspring in a non-accusatory way. She said to tell them there is no reason to set up a website for an anonymous person to harass them. The kids are being cruel to themselves by inviting this treatment.
"Even if your teen says no one has ever said anything mean to her/him on this site, hold your ground," she said. "It's only a matter of time."
Does your kid have a Formspring? Have you been monitoring it?
Don't you love the way our schools save sex ed for the end of the year?
My theory is that this timing minimizes the schools having to deal with parental complaints about the content of the curriculum. Any angry parent will likely cool off over the summer.
I got my seventh-grader's form allowing us to opt out of the teaching. I enjoyed reading what she will learn about: Puberty, personal hygiene, male and female reproductive systems, sexually transmitted diseases, and contraception, including "condoms, sponges, birth control pills, and natural family planning (scientific photographs are used)."
I wonder how many people choose not to have their kids participate. I could see them thinking seventh-graders are not ready for talk about sexually transmitted diseases and condoms, although most of us know that young teenagers are more sexually active than we want to admit.
I'm not too excited about my daughter seeing the killer whale show today at SeaWorld Orlando.
We had signed up for our elementary school's fifth-grade trip before the 12,000-pound whale, Tilikum, killed Dawn Brancheau, his trainer, in February.
The killing gave me a new perspective on what a life of confinement must be like for the mammoth orcas. I decided not to patronize SeaWorld. But what about my kid?
I don't know which performing whale she will see or if SeaWorld has changed its policies since the death. But I'll remind her of what happened there and hope she realizes that the animals she observes are not in their natural habitats, although the park makes it seem like they are.
Now that my 16-year-old is a licensed driver, my husband and I are trying to figure out what are some reasonable rules for her to follow.
Some friends of ours sent over these:
"Only you in the car until end of school (5 months). This will be re-evaluated at the end of school. Any passengers must be pre-approved and typically only under unusual circumstances.
You must text either Mom or Dad before departing any location and upon arrival (except home – if someone is there).
No driving anywhere you do not know how to get to.
You are responsible for all traffic fines.
If you are uncomfortable driving or incapable of driving –CALL SOMEONE! NO TROUBLE!
We will try and accommodate car availability. No complaining, nagging or whining.
No texting or cell phone while car is running!
If the rules are broken, there will be consequences (loss of driving privileges).
If we are asleep, you must wake us when you get home."
I liked a lot of these, especially the "No complaining, nagging or whining." But I wouldn't necessarily rule out banning her from going somewhere she hasn't been to before.
What do you think? What kinds of rules have you created for your teenage drivers?
Last night, I regretted inviting my kids to watch "Glee" with me.
The Fox show about a high school glee club started out last year as a fun, funny musical comedy show with a subversive edge. But last night's show, ostensibly about Madonna and girl empowerment, was really about sex, which couples were going to have sex, which songs they would sing during foreplay, in front of the bed, on the bed, in the bathroom, etc.
I became increasingly frustrated and uncomfortable as the plot proceeded. After the cast sang Madonna's "Like A Virgin," I decided to attempt a teachable moment. "Do you know what a virgin is?" I asked.
"Yes, mom." It wasn't the right time to get into a whole conversation about sexual decisionmaking, so the teachable moment ended there.
Now that my kids are into the show, I'm not going to pull the plug. But I hope the plot lines get back to the competitiveness, intrigue, pettiness and popularity contests of high school that made the show an original sensation last year.
I was thrilled that I won't have to pay for private classes, which can cost hundreds of dollars and whose benefits are unclear.
For three hours.
