By Lisa J. Huriash

As a new mom on a tight budget, I am always on the hunt to find the best deals. I have compared prices of diapers, wipes and formula and finally figured out that I can combine store coupons with manufacturer coupons with sales listed in the Sunday newspaper to try to get the lowest cost.

This is my list of some of the best places to score coupons or savings. If you know of any others, feel free to share!

www.publix.com/clubs/baby (Coupons mailed regularly for diapers and wipes and even coupons for free samples of items such as rice cereal and rubbing alcohol)

winndixie.com (Enroll in “Baby Club Program” to receive store coupons. You need a Reward Card to participate which can you apply for online)

www.enfamil.com (Join “Enfamil Family Beginnings” to get manufacturer formula coupons)

www.similac.com (Join “StrongMoms” to get mailed manufacturer formula coupons)

www.gerber.com (sign up for coupons for formula and baby food)

www.pampers.com (Join Pampers Village) to find out about when Pampers coupons will be in the Sunday newspaper. When you buy Pampers you can accumulate “Gifts To Grow” points to apply toward baby gifts

www.huggies.com/en-US (diaper coupons. Huggies also has a rewards program)

www.beechnut.com (Beech-Nut baby food coupons)

www.earthsbest.com (Earth Best diaper and food coupons although be warned not all the coupons on the company home page print because “this offer has expired.”)

www.johnsonsbaby.com (Johnson & Johnson products. Sign up for “Johnson’s by your side” for offers)

www.target.com (scroll the baby site to find deals. One posted now, for example, offers 15 percent savings when you buy two or more diapers, wipes, food, formula or toiletries through Sept. 10)

You can also sign up on Amazon Mom (free membership for savings of 15 percent off many items).

And, although it’s not a place for coupons, you can call for a free kite for your little one from the Children’s Hospital at St. Mary’s Medical Center at 561-841-KIDS.

Photo courtesy of paparutzi. Some rights reserved.

One of my Facebook “friends” recently posted an album with photos depicting a timeline of her labor and the birth of her baby. I wouldn’t call this person an actual friend of mine; she’s the sister of a college friend whom I rarely speak to anymore.

I have no idea what compelled me to look at these photos. Once I clicked on the album and saw the thumbnails, it was like a car accident. I didn’t want to look, but something wouldn’t let me not look. I was even more intrigued when I noticed she was at home and had some type of portable bathtub.

Home and water births are great for some people, but I need a hospital with my doctor, a bunch of nurses, an operating room and NICU (just in case), and a nursery.

I don’t know if I was mortified because I’m only a few weeks away from delivering my own baby or if I would be mortified even if I wasn’t pregnant.

The pictures showed her walking around outside her house trying to make the contractions speed up; gripping onto her kitchen counter in crazy pain; sitting in the water-filled, plastic-lined bathtub wearing nothing but a sports bra; squatting in the tub with her husband with captions like, “12:24 a.m., crowning” and “the last push”; and finally, her and the husband holding the baby. I’m just glad the photos were that antique black-and-white color so I couldn’t clearly see the water.

Continue reading "TMI: Vivid birth photos on Facebook" »

The American Academy of Pediatrics recently released its new car seat guidelines for children. A “Today Moms” article summed up the changes:

• Children should ride rear-facing to age 2, or until they reach the maximum height and weight for their seat. (The old policy from 2002 cited age 12 months and 20 pounds as a minimum for when to turn a seat around.)
• Children should use a booster seat until they have reached 4 feet 9 inches tall and are between 8 and 12 years old.
• Children should ride in the rear of a vehicle until they are 13 years old.

I remember how happy I was the day I got to turn my 1-year-old son’s car seat around. I have a two-door car, which I have no plans of getting rid of because it’s paid off, and the bigger he got, the harder it was to lift him into a rear-facing seat. He is tall for his age, too, and I can’t imagine he would have been able to remain rear-facing until he turned 2. He’s just too tall, and his legs would have been crunched.

Some moms are having trouble accepting the guidelines. The “Today Moms” article quotes a mom of three who isn’t planning on following the new rules:

Carolyn Murray of West Milford, New Jersey, has already transitioned two of her three kids out of car seats. While Murray's 6-year-old son James still uses a booster, daughters, Samantha, 9, and Emily, 11, haven't had one for years.

Murray isn't planning on following the guidelines, saying that most of her driving is in town and not on highways, and she doesn't want the hassle of needing extra car seats when she drives her kids' friends.

Plus, she says she could never get her 11-year-old to comply: “She would fight it.”

"I agree it's probably safer with short children, since seatbelts can cut into their neck. But there's no way she is going to sit in a booster seat. It's an image thing."

Emily says sitting in a booster seat simply isn't cool. “My friends would laugh.”

Even though the guidelines seem inconvenient, I think it’s probably still better to follow them. I would never forgive myself I was in an accident, and my kids were injured because of my refusal to conform to rules that were created solely for their safety.

For more details about the guidelines, visit http://www.aap.org/advocacy/releases/carseat2011.htm.

If you're week is going anything like mine, then you should appreciate the awesome expressions from this baby as he witnesses his mother blowing her nose. He shifts from being completely terrified to wonderfully amused. Enjoy.

EMBED-Baby Scared By Mother's Nose - Watch more free videos

Remember when they were this small? I barely do, even though my youngest is only approaching his 3rd birthday. Few things are as infectious as the pure laughter from a baby. Enjoy. Happy Friday!

When I was pregnant the first time, registering for baby items was a nightmare. I specifically remember encountering the vast assortment of bottles and the subsequent feelings of anxiety and cluelessness.

Some of that has gone away when it comes to preparing for the second child, but I find myself facing a new challenge: double strollers. Do I really need one? Why are they so darn expensive? Which is better: side by side or one seat in front of the other? Does brand matter?

I wonder if I’m going to use it often enough to get a nice one. My son will have been 3 for two months after my daughter is born, and after getting used to carrying all 35 pounds of him around, I think carrying a baby will be a cinch, so maybe I can just wear her in a carrier or trade on and off with the stroller. (Side note: I remember thinking my son was heavy to carry around when he was a baby, but I had no idea what I was in for!)

I had sticker shock when I went testing out different doubles. The cheapest one at one store was $400. That store had higher-end brands, but still. My friends are split on whether a better quality brand really matters. I’m leaning toward a cheaper one, but what if it’s so uncomfortable that the baby hates it and refuses to sit peacefully?

Any opinions on whether it’s worth it to go all out on a really nice double?

While spending a weekend up in Daytona Beach, I came across an article about Flagler Palm Coast High School’s recent announcement that it will use a grant from the Florida Department of Health's Healthy Communities, Healthy People program to provide a room for nursing mothers, complete with a breast pump, seating, a refrigerator and access to a lactation consultant.

It’s exciting to see a grant like this going to encourage breast-feeding. I hope the concept catches on in more work environments.

I know it can be difficult for some new mothers to find a private, comfortable place to pump when they return to work after giving birth. I remember being moved from one empty office to another and feeling embarrassed that the person in the adjacent office could hear the sound of the pump through the wall, especially if that person was a man.

The article says it’s especially challenging for teachers because they need to find someone to watch their classroom while they pump.

The article quotes Pat Lindsey, a lactation consultant and president of the Florida Breastfeeding Coalition, who says many women don’t feel comfortable breast-feeding at work (maybe because there usually aren’t adequate accommodations for nursing mothers?) but that women who breast-feed are more productive and have lower health care costs than mothers who don’t breast-feed.

Also quoted was Deborah Saulsbury, a regional coordinator for Communities Putting Prevention to Work, a Department of Health and Human Services initiative, who said, “Everybody knows about the benefits, but people don't realize how that translates into dollars saved for the district because the teachers aren't absent as much.”

She added that most women whose workplace is not breast-feeding-friendly will switch to formula within about 30 days.

Lindsey said having a place to pump "is a necessity for a great deal of women in the workplace. More women have gone to work, and they are still mothers. They need to be able to be a mother and also be able to do what they need to do."

Read the full article here.

I went to visit a friend recently. Her baby is about six months and needless to say I was shocked to find that she already had stacks of his clothes set aside to be donated.

Some of it was newborn stuff he outgrew. Some of it was clothes friends and relatives had bought, which she said doesn’t match his style. I didn’t know six-month-old babies had a style, but that’s another story.

All in all I had to commend her for her diligence. She’s a true minimalist and she had no problems parting with his little onesies and booties and all of his little baby clothes that just scream CUTE.

She said she had enough pictures with him in his outfits to keep the memories alive. And if and when she goes down the mommy path again, she’s prepared to start afresh with a whole new wardrobe for that baby.

I’m all for donating clothes so that other children who really need them could make use of them. But I’m also super sentimental when it comes to my daughter’s stuff. I look at a pair of tap shoes that no longer fit and so many memories run through my mind.

I still like to hold on to some of the clothes she wore at three months. They remind me of just how much she’s grown.

Don't get me wrong, I’ve given away a great deal, but I’ve held on to a great deal, also.

I take comfort in knowing that i'm not extreme. I have a friend who has a walk-in closet crammed with her daughter’s baby clothes and her daughter is 12. And an aunt with a garage full of baby clothes that her four daughters once wore.

I can understand. I know everyone has their own comfort level. But I left my minimalist friend’s house feeling somewhat inspired to get rid of more. Rather than invest in more plastic containers to store adorable clothes she'll never wear again, I’ve invested in another memory card for my camera.

Now that you have joined the ranks of momminess – you are the mother of a lot of ideas – aren’t you?

Well, Huggies thinks you are. The Kimberly-Clark brand is launching a grant program - Huggies MomInspired - to provide inventive moms with the seed capital they need to help transform viable ideas into successful new businesses.

After all, Huggies says moms are “often creative problem-solvers that typically embody natural entrepreneur characteristics on a daily basis.”

To be considered for a grant moms, 21 years or older, residing in the United States, must submit an application online, outlining a unique baby or child care product idea that addresses an unmet parenting need.

Winners will be awarded with up to $15,000 per grant to help fund their product ideas.
Hurry up, the deadline is June 9.

Follow Cindy Kent on Twitter.com @mindingyourbiz

I have a thing for shopping for baby clothes. There's something about those tiny dresses that make me want to buy the whole rack. Time seems to fly when I'm running around in a store looking for stuff to bring to a baby shower.

A friend of mine, who is expecting, recently posted her registry, and I couldn't help but notice that she wanted mostly organic baby clothes. I know organic cotton is the thing these days, but her organic picks were quite costly compared to non organic clothing. An organic bib for $16, some organic onesies for $25 each, and some baby yoga sets for 50 bucks.

While I'm all for giving a baby a healthy start, I can't help but wonder if these organic baby clothes are just another way to pump more money out of new-age moms.

I can see spending a lot of money on organic baby food, but does Baby Sam really need to have an organic bib to spit up on?

And once you start your baby out on organic clothing do you run the risk of having to keep them in organic gear throughout their childhood? I gave in and got my friend one of her organic picks, a yellow onesie with some matching socks.

It was hard to resist, organic or non-organic, baby clothes are just so cute.

I can still feel my tiny sleeping newborn snuggling on my chest, his breath in rhythm with my own. There is really nothing better than that pure and blissful moment.

Until you walk in the door from a long day, and his little arms fly up in the air in greeting and a huge drooly smile spreads across the infant's face he's just so happy to see you.

And it just keeps getting better. From smiling to walking to talking. I've always thought that each phase of a child's life is better than the last -- more miraculous, more fun.

Even now, when I walk in the door from a long day and I'm greeted with something closer to a snarl and a grunt from the gangly adolescent. I'm awestruck that I created this, and that everything is working the way nature intended. He's supposed to be drawing away from me at this age, in preparation for the day he's out on his own. Isn't that cool?

When I recently interviewed Maria Bailey, of Mom Talk Radio and BlueSuitMom.com, she said she hears from lots of moms who don't think like I do, who don't think each stage is better than the last.

Maria loves the teen years -- she has three teens and an 11-year-old. "I love it when they make good decisions," she said. And she loves to see how she has rubbed off on them.

I, too, like to watch my kids figure things out, learn from their mistakes, develop into their own personality. That's what's so much fun.

They toddle and fall, pick themselves back up to try again, and soon they are running out the door to play. They babble and imitate to form words and soon they talking back with their own opinions, however illogical and hasty they may be.

No doubt some stages are less complicated than others. As I recall, age 3 is...hard. And my daughter, at age 11, is so easy, I wouldn't mind stretching that out awhile.

What about you? Do you have a favorite stage in your child's life? Or are you really looking forward to age 16?

This morning I was checking my Facebook page and I found a note from a very good friend. His wife had just given birth! However, this normally celebrated occasion was a bit tempered as the baby is extremely premature. Weighing in at only one pound, the child has been given a 40% chance of survival by her team of doctors. I told him "congratulations", but it just didn't sound right.

After hanging up the phone, my mind started wandering back to my own experience with the birth of my first child. Although nowhere near as severe, my daughter was 6 weeks premature and weighed only 4 lbs. 15 oz. I remember the 18 days we spent in the hospital as if they were yesterday. The support we had from friends, family, and coworkers made all the difference in coping. It is amazing what the power of positive energy can do. My daughter just turned six, and we have celebrated every minute of her life.

I've seen my family go through the other side of this experience as well. My cousin had twins and there were serious complications. Long story short, only one of her daughters survived. Today is actually the anniversary of her daughter's passing. Listening to her and her husband speak at their infant daughter's funeral was one of the most heartbreaking things I have witnessed. Their story really showed me that every single second of life is precious.

Please help me send positive energy (prayers, if that is your thing), thoughts, and words out to this child who is only hours old and is fighting for her life. Share your stories with us if you've had similar experiences, and hug your kids tight!

If your baby, toddler or child of any age is crying - you want to know why, right?

For instance, if your car were acting up, you might look under the hood before taking the vehicle to the mechanic. If your computer suddenly froze up - you're likely to push a few buttons or scoot the mouse around the pad.

So if your infant or baby is all red-faced, teary-eyed, fit-to-be-tied-bawling-his-or-her-eyes-out -- get over it - by checking it out the old-fashioned way: touch, hold, cuddle, sooth, coo, hug and in general assess the situation of said tiny being.

But wait, forget all that - don't trouble yourself - here's an App for that. I'm sorry to be the one to break the news to you.

The Cry Translator, according to promotional verbiage is, "an easy to use iPhone app that quickly identifies the five distinct cries made by infants: hungry, sleepy,annoyed, stressed or bored. These five cries are universal to all babies regardless of culture or language."

Wow. I'm speechless. Don't get me wrong - there are a few apps I am a huge fan of - Paper Toss is my fav.

But just imagine, you hear the child cry and you approach gingerly. Finally, thinks baby, I'll get some food or be held [insert other need/want here]. Instead, Baby sees tiny microphone held to face area. The outstretched arm is merely a tease. Baby increases wailing.

How will the app translate that?

Well, once is does, there are some suggestions on how to care for the child - which means while the Baby continues to cry, you begin reading a paragraph or two on what to do next.

Frankly, you really need to just put down your gadgets and pick up the child. It's called communication. What ever happened to consulting with the co-parent; Neighbors, people at work, on play dates in the park, grandparents, etc?

A 16-second Saturday Night Live skit says it all. Gosh.

Please, if you have this app - don't tell me. It'll make me want to cry.

Anita Tedaldi adopted a baby boy, but it didn't work out -- she couldn't bond with him. So another family took him off her hands.

That's the headline, the thing that has everyone buzzing. She wrote about her experience on the New York Times' Motherlode blog and appeared on the Today show on Thursday.

It's really easy to judge Anita: heartless, for starters. How about selfish. Intolerant. Probably just plain mean.

But this is a woman with five biological daughters, who parents alone when her military husband is deployed. She clearly does not shy away from motherhood. Maybe she wasn't completely prepared. But she had to know about colic and sleepless nights and worse. She knew that adopting a baby who had been left by the side of a South American road would come with some baggage.

Anita will be a punching bag for a few news cycles. Her motives will be questioned. Why did she need another child? And why on earth did she have to write about it? Was this some kind of grand publicity stunt to promote her own blog?

But why wouldn't she talk about it? We are in a self-confessional age in which everyone purges their transgressions on the Internet, and we all pile on. It's our new national sport.

I think the bigger question to ponder is not why she did what she did. But what would you do?

A lot of things about being a first time parent made me nervous. In particular, Leo would howl in protest whenever we put him in his bassinet, and he would not let up. The notion that he would spend an entire night in there was laughable. It wasn’t going to happen. Sorry.

We’re co sleepers. Leo sleeps with us, in the same bed. Yeah, I was nervous about it, but we got used to it. In this “controversial” practice, we are joined (if my limited research is any indication) by a little more than half of all parents around the world. I have to wonder why something practiced by half the human population is controversial, but apparently it is.

The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission is opposed to co sleeping. At first, I wanted to know why this particular agency was weighing in. After all, my baby is not a consumer product. Then I realized the bed is, and that’s where the commission has standing. Fair enough. The American Academy of Pediatrics concurs with the CPSC, concerned, apparently, with the possibility of people rolling over and accidentally suffocating their kids, among other risks.

But it seems a growing number of experts are touting co sleeping as normal and beneficial, and the identified risks, they say, are either overstated or easily addressed.

Noted expert Dr. William Sears outlines seven benefits of co sleeping. According to his research, with co sleeping:
Babies sleep better
Mothers sleep better
Breastfeeding is easier
It’s “contemporary parenting”
Babies thrive better
Parents and babies become more connected
The risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is reduced.

I’m not en expert on either side of this (especially that last item: a year ago the experts were warning us that co sleeping increases the risk of SIDS). All I know is that the best professionals on parenting have been giving conflicting advice on all sorts of issues for generations. Maybe, like me, you were told “thou shalt not share thy bed with thy baby.” And maybe that was good advice.

And maybe it wasn’t.

So here's a good resource: The March of Dimes has an information page that points out the risks and how to address them.

Leo was not yet two months old when he was enrolled in his first class. The original plan was for him to go with his mom every week, but we decided it might be better if I went with him instead. For most of the course, I was the only dad who showed up (that changed in the final weeks).

The class is called Play Together, Learn Together: Your Amazing Newborn, and it's designed for children starting at age six weeks to three months. Our particular group met every Monday. There weren't that many of us, which was remarkable considering that it was a free class. As in no charge, no obligation, honest to goodness free (the one thing they did request was antibacterial wipes, which everyone was glad to bring in).

Leo loved it. I loved it. It gave us a special time together that can never be replaced. We sang songs and explored different kinds of toys (ever see an infant wrestle a small, unopened bag of potato chips? It's a hoot). It was a thrill to see Leo respond to sights, sounds, smells and textures around him. And the parents always had a chance to talk to each other and the class coordinator about the myths of parenthood and the realities of our experiences.

The 14-week class is at the Mailman Segal Institute located on Nova Southeastern University’s main campus in Davie. A new semester starts next week, and registration is still open. Classes begin Sept. 8 and run through Dec. 14.

Naturally, the institute has other classes for which they do charge, but if you've got a newborn and a limited budget, the free Amazing Newborns class is a value that can't be beat.

For more information on the class and on registration, call 954-262-6949 or click here.

Women who have given birth looo-oo-ove to talk about it. They love to talk about all the gory details, they love to play "top that." Over drinks, on the soccer sidelines, at PTA events eventually and inevitably, there's a chorus of "when my water broke during the board meeting.....I pushed for 48 straight hours....and then my idiot husband....and the baby's head was as big as....."

OK, ok, since you asked. My favorite part was when I heaved myself over the hospital admissions desk and the idiot nurse, in her whiny stupid voice asks, "Are you in labor?" and I say, "No sh-- Sherlock." That was fun! Or some hours later when I screamed, "GIVE ME THE EPIDURAL!!!" And the nurse screams back, "IT'S TOO LATE!!!" That wasn't as much fun.

But my stories are NOTHING compared to what you'll see on TLC network's new series: I Didn't Know I was Pregnant. This series promises to reveal "the astonishing stories of women who conceive and carry their babies all the way to labor and delivery, while never even knowing they were pregnant."

I'm still sitting here slack-jawed. There are enough women to make a SERIES out of this phenomenon?? Are you kidding me? It's been several years and the painful memories do fade, but lemme tell ya, I can still conjure up those backaches and swollen ankles and, well, I'll spare the details here. I can't imagine NOT KNOWING!

Tonight's debut episode at 9 p.m. sounds intriguing: "Nicci, a 31-year old mother of three goes into labor and gives birth at home with some surprising help from her 10-year-old son - and she didn't even know she was pregnant!" This is a woman with experience in these matters!

So you know where I'll be tonight at 9 p.m....pass the popcorn and the Chardonnay.

PHOTO: Photos.com

Photo credit: Elizabeth Potenza/Fort Lauderdale

This is an amazing story.

Wait, this just in: Update - earlier today, there was a report about a newborn about to undergo surgery to remove an undeveloped fetus from its mouth, in Miami. After a news conference, reporters learned it's NOT a twin.

At this point, I am also reframing my post to be more reflective of the new information.

A child was born with a tumor covering the face. Here is the story about the recent surgery and recovery of the now two-month-old child

Our hearts tug at stories about children and families facing challenges.

Operations for any child can overwhelm every family member.

KidsHealth.org provides some guidance of how to prepare your family - and you - for hospital experiences such as visits and surgery

My daughter Ana Isabel was one of those chunky babies. She weighed 20 pounds at six months.

If I would've read this story back then, it would have worried me. It basically says that infants who gain weight rapidly in the first months of life have a greater chance of being obese by the time they turn 3. This story is based on a study published in the April issue of Pediatrics, a medical journal.

I'm glad to report Ana, now 3 1/2, is not obese. She weighs about 35 pounds now, which is normal for her age.

Nonetheless, the study goes against the common perception that a heavier baby is a healthier baby. It also comes at a time when many experts worry about childhood obesity.

So now what are we supposed to do now put infants on a diet? What do you think?

He needs water. My mother said so. Water will get rid of his hiccups.

Yes, I tried to explain that giving water to a newborn is not generally a good idea. We talked to our pediatrician about Leo's formula because he seemed to be spitting up a bit. We are following our pediatrician's advice, which brings us back to rejecting my mother's advice.

And then Leo has another hiccup.

He needs water. My mother said so. Water will get rid of his hiccups.

Continue reading "Grandparents: Good intentions, bad advice?" »

Today we bring you our first guest writer:

I wrote last week about our decision to bottlefeed Leo after our foray into breastfeeding didn't work out as we would have liked. In a bit of admitted unfairness, I chided the "breast milk mafia" for being so enthusiastic in their advocacy of breastfeeding that they sometimes, inadvertently, make parents feel guilty about choosing formula.

Well, most advocates of breastfeeding aren't like that at all, and I was really pleased to hear from Elita, an Oakland Park mom who encourages breastfeeding and didn't take too kindly to being compared to a member of the Corleone crime family. She prefers the term "lactivist," and I asked her to share some thoughts with us in response to what I wrote. She makes some powerful points.

Here's what she wrote:

It’s been said time and time again, and I’m sure you’ve heard it by now: breast is best. But guess what? Breast isn’t best. Breast is just normal and natural. It’s the way babies want to and should be fed. Saying breast is “best” sets it as a lofty goal, often one that feels unattainable by many moms.

And the research shows that often it is. Although we’re currently at an all-time high breastfeeding initiation rate (about 70% of new moms are nursing when they leave the hospital), a paltry 30% are still nursing at six months and only about 12% at one year. When you look at the rates for African-American moms, they're even lower. We, as a society, have set moms up for failure. We tell them to only give their babies breast milk for the first six months and to nurse for at LEAST one year, but we make it nearly impossible for them at every turn.

Gave birth in a hospital? You had a 30% chance of ending up with a C-section, and studies have shown that women who have C-sections have more difficulty with nursing.

Then there's the formula. Your baby was probably supplemented (even if you aren't aware of it) and the hospital probably gave you a "breastfeeding support bag" that curiously contained formula. You probably also got some formula delivered to your front door, courtesy of your OBGYN. The research on this is very clear: breastfeeding duration is shortened when women are given free samples of formula.

Continue reading "The 'Breast Milk Mafia' strikes back" »

Shh. Don’t tell anyone. We’re feeding Leo formula. I said SHHH!!!!!

Oh, great, it’s out now.

Now I’m going to hear it from the Breast Milk Mafia. At least, that’s what I’ve been told. I have no knowledge that such an organization exists. But something in the back of my head suspects that they do, in the same way that the “Liberal Media” exist. No one will ever admit to being a part of it, and those in it are least likely to recognize it.

Stock photo: Not Leo

No one wants to be a quitter. No one wants to say “we gave up.” Language like that inadvertently leads to feelings of guilt when the mother, sore and exasperated, looks at you with tears in her eyes because it’s 2 a.m. and the baby’s hungry and that means another round of pain that's becoming more and more unbearable with each feeding.

We switched to formula. The decision was made with tears, followed by relief. Leo slept longer. His weight loss reversed. I can feed the baby. Mom can feed the baby. Big Big Sis and Little Big Sis can feed the baby.

The literature, and the American Academy of Pediatrics, will tell you that “Breast is best.” And they’re right. Who am I to argue? But imagine my pleasure when I read that “Breastfeeding is considered the best nutritional option for babies by the major medical organizations, but it's not right for every mother.” Imagine the pleasure of being able to console my wife, who was bottlefed and who bottlefed her first daughter, that it’s okay to bottlefeed. I was bottlefed.

In fact, shhh, most mothers try breastfeeding in the hospital, but by the time the baby reaches six months of age, only 27 percent are still breastfeeding at all, and just 8 percent are breastfeeding exclusively.

I’m not saying breastfeeding is a bad thing. Quite the opposite. All I'm saying is that women should not feel guilty for opting for formula. The birth of our child has opened a flood of emotions in our household. There's no room for guilt.

To those who manage to breastfeed for a significant amount of time, my wife and I salute you.

For those who chose formula, we’re with you.

My son was born a week and a half ago. My feet haven’t quite touched the ground yet, but I’m back at work and still trying to take stock of how much things have changed.

Shortly before Leo was born, I asked readers for a bit of advice. The feedback was good and profound. A reader named Cathy wrote, “There's a good line from a Steve Martin movie...there's no way to be a perfect parent but there are a million ways to be a good one.” I liked that. A personal friend told me to remember “the days are long, but the years are short.” Very, very true.

The two pieces of advice I have are not nearly as profound, but I hope they help more than one dad-to-be out there. Here it goes:

First, learn to swaddle the baby. You’ll mostly need this skill on night two, when the baby realizes his change of environment is permanent. He’ll feel a little more secure if he’s in that snug environment. It’s likely the nurses and other hospital staff will be able to help you with this, but you’ll be proud to be able to do it yourself.

Second, assuming you’re going to be spending a night or two in the hospital with your wife, do yourself one favor. Bring an air mattress. The sofa bed you’ll be sleeping on is not fit for human backs. True, you’ll be so tired those first two nights that you will manage to sleep anyway. And your discomfort is nothing compared with what your roommate will have just endured, but still.

I hope you weren’t expecting anything more profound. I don’t have it, yet. I can tell you that I feel so much closer to my wife. I feel closer to my stepdaughters, too. I don’t share a blood relationship with Kay and Pax, but my son is their brother, and that cements us as a family. From the day I married their mom, I promised Kay and Pax that I would love them as my very own. But how could I have known what that meant? I didn’t have a child of my own until a week and a half ago.

Now I have three, because I understand now what that promise meant.

Everyone is different. I can’t tell you that you will become closer to the members of your household. I can’t tell you that your relationship with your wife will become deeper and more meaningful. That’s not advice. It’s been my privilege to experience, and it is my wish for you.

My advice? Learn to swaddle. And bring an air mattress. Your back will thank you.

Welcome to the world, Leo. Nice to finally see you.

I don't have much time to write today. I have the week off work to take care of the newborn. That's him. Leonardo Enrique Olmeda.

My wife and I took our time settling on the first name. I insisted on his middle name, in honor of my late stepfather Jose Enrique Girona. My dad and namesake, who lives in the Bronx, is content to pass on the last name (another grandson has his name).

Two things I like about Leo (the name). Just like his dad, Leo is a pizza-loving, crime fighting turtle. And his initials spell out his name. That is so cool. My initials spell out Superman's deity. Not so cool.

How'd you pick your baby's name?

I can vouch for the influence parents have over their communities.

When I was way too young to remember, my dad was on the front lines of the civil rights movement. He represented white people pushing for change, he represented his faith as a Presbyterian minister, and ultimately, he simply represented his family.

Recently, one of my brothers found this clip about him from an old 1961 edition of Jet Magazine. He was quoted, “Let me tell you of several incidents when Jesus was caught in the act of sitting-in,” said Henry Warren Kunce. I cannot begin to express my pride!

So it’s not a stretch for me to see the value in National Parent Leadership Month that honors and celebrates parents for the vital roles they fill in their homes and communities.

But, not everyone has the opportunity to take on a mission like the one my dad did.

Still, other issues are just as noble, like Prevent Child Abuse Florida. For many, it’s a cause way too close to home.

The organization engages parent leaders in developing program strategies and public awareness materials through its Florida Circle of Parents program, to prevent child abuse and neglect through mutual, self-help parent support groups.

Based on shared leadership, mutual respect, and inclusiveness, the free, confidential and non-judgmental groups are open to anyone in a parenting or care-giving role.

There are 54 groups throughout Florida.

Find a Florida Circle of Parents support group in your area.

Well, here goes everything.

If all goes according to plan, the next time I report in this space, I will be a biological father for the first time.

I've been a stepfather for the last 19 months, but it's not the same thing. I wasn't there for their births, for their first words or their first steps. I didn't see them off to school for the first time ever, and I missed maybe 100 dance recitals and performances. I've done what I can, screwed up plenty, tried to understand and tried to get them to understand.

I feel as though I have evolved so much in the last two years. I'm no longer the clueless bachelor stepping into fatherhood, but neither do I feel ready for what's coming in just three days. This tiny little boy is about to show up and change everything I've ever known.

Can I confess to being nervous? (Could I possibly deny it?)

One of the things I hear all the time from parents is that they wish they knew then what they know now: about parenthood, about being a father, about life, about children, about what makes a marriage strong...

Well, you can't go back in time, but you can throw a little bit of your hard-earned wisdom in my direction.

So let me have it. Give me one piece of advice, a piece of advice you wish you'd had before you became a dad for the first time.

Priority #1: Safety. Hands down, when it comes to our children. But somehow, we let our guard down in the process of making child care decisions.

Parents of children under the age of 6 are most concerned about safety when choosing child care, according to a recent survey. The report, Parents' Perceptions of Child Care in the United States, highlights other top issues: learning environments with trained child care providers, and cost. Zogby International conducted the telephone poll of 1,004 parents in November for the National Association of Child Care Resource & Referral Agencies.

The report also revealed that parents assume a lot: that there is governmental oversight to ensure child care safety; that background checks are conducted and employees do get training on child development, CPR, child guidance and discipline, and can recognize signs of child abuse.

Sometimes, we parents are naive, just like our children. We place complete trust and faith in the system, just as our children do us. The report went on to say parents believe that state governments license and inspect all child care programs. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. The NACCRRA reports that only about half of the states inspect child care settings only once a year or less.

The report details its findings on cost and other child care issues. The NACCRRA provides links, facts and score cards.

If you had been asked - and other than safety – what is your biggest child care concern?

A confession: I’m a bigot. I don’t trust pit bulls, especially around children.

Now before the defenders and detractors line up with their documented evidence of why I’m right or wrong, let me just say that the pit bull living on my property now is the dopiest, friendliest, most goofiest bundle of fun imaginable. But in a week and a half, my wife and I are coming home with a baby, and we want the pit bull gone.

The dog belongs to another family member who is not in a position at the moment to care for him.

I’ve read the literature. I’m familiar with the arguments presented by sites such as Jason Mann’s Pit Bull Lovers page. And I sympathize with those who have tried to stand up for the breed’s reputation.

But I’m also a reporter, which makes me paranoid, and a father-to-be, which makes me doubly so, and that paranoia leads me to think that when campaigns have to be organized to assure me that a particular animal is safe around infants, it’s because they’re not. Pit bulls and babies go together like Freddy Krueger and teenagers.

Ok, I'm exaggerating. In truth, this is a personal decision, not really a bigoted one. If I felt our family had the time, inclination and resources to properly train and raise a pit bull, this big fella would be just the right fit. But honestly, we don’t. And that’s the kind of dog news stories get written about. You know the stories. They always contain quotes like “He never acted up before” and “She was the friendliest dog.”

It’s not the dog, it’s the owner. I get that. And I don’t have the time to be the owner this dog deserves. And neither does anyone else in our household. So maybe my decision, my insistence, would be the wrong thing for your household. But as far as I’m concerned, it’s the right thing for mine, if for no other reason than that the dog deserves a better home.

[By the way: I'm not a dog breeder, veterinarian or expert. I'm speaking as a guy about to bring his firstborn son home next weekend. An expert may look at the picture above and say, "What an idiot. That's not a pit bull." If that's the case, enlighten me. I can take it.]

In the meantime, check out this video, on YouTube under the title “Pit Bull Viciously Attacks Baby.”

My son’s birth is less than two weeks away, so this request for advice is, I’ll admit, a little late. But maybe not for all our readers.

We picked our hospital based on a number of factors, not the least of which was the likelihood of getting a private room for my wife’s stay. Without a private room, the girls and I can’t stay the night. One hospital we checked couldn’t guarantee it, and was going to charge us extra if we were among the lucky few to get a private room. I’ll say that again: IF we were among the lucky few.

It would be one thing to save up for the private room if we could guarantee we’d get one when the time came, but the hospital actually advised us on how to rush out of the delivery room, down the hall, through the double doors, past Simon, Paula and Randy, up the stairs, around the kitchen and behind the laundry room to let them know we wanted a private room, IF one is available. And after all that, the answer could still be no!

Pardon me, but I’ll have other things on my mind in the minutes after my son’s birth. I can't follow the directions on a box of Lucky Charms. They expect me to remember how to get around that labyrinth in the minutes after my son is born?

We ended up scheduling the birth at a hospital where all the maternity rooms are private.

So here’s my question: What’s the best hospital in South Florida for giving birth? And by what standard? Privacy? Quality of care? Nursing staff? Security? Neonatal ICU? How do you judge?

My son Lucas Emilio has been a champion sleeper until now.

As a newborn, he slept in three and four hour stretches overnight. As he has grown, he has given his mommy and daddy (admittedly, mostly mommy) stretches of up to six hours straight.

We have been overjoyed with how well Lucas has slept, especially since my three-year-old daughter, Ana Isabel, never slept for more than two hours it seemed for the first six months of her young life.

But now, Lucas has taken a turn and has started waking every two hours. And that's driving my wife and I a bit crazy.

We can't figure it out. We're almost to the point where we will let him cry it out. We did that with Ana. It was hard. But it worked.

We're perplexed as to why my son would seem to be regressing with his sleeping patterns.

Any idea on why this may be happening or suggestions?

My almost three-old-year old daughter, Ana Isabel, caught a cold at Mommy and Me. And she brought it home, promptly sharing it with her little brother, Lucas Emilio, who is five weeks old.

Not exactly the kind of sharing we would like. Nonetheless, we never had to deal with a sick Ana at this age since she didn't have other little children brining home germs.

Lucas mostly sounds congested and he makes a lot of noises when he sleeps. Before this came on, he was sleeping in three and four hour stretches, which was great for a kid his age. Not any more.

We have a suction bulb that we use to clear his nose. And we prop up his body so the mucus can drain when he sleeps. I know some say a humidifier can help loosen up the congestion.

But is there anything else that we can do to deal with a cold in baby at this age? I know drugs are out. A tired and sleep papa would welcome any suggestions.

Lucas Emilio was barely two days old and already someone was pulling at momma’s and papi's heartstrings to spend money. The photographer in the hospital wanted to take pictures, which, of course, she would sell to us.

My wife didn't have the heart or the energy to say no. She was recovering from giving birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy. (7 pounds 6 ounces and 19.5 inches long). So about the 15th time the photographer came in and just as we were getting ready to leave the hospital, I said no thank you. The woman seemed shocked. She actually made a pouty face.

Not that we didn't want to record the moment. We have a standard digital camera. I have taken hundreds and hundreds of pictures already. Some of them actually turned out pretty good. We're using three of them for the birth announcement and we're using one of the online photo sights to print it up and send it out. That's saving us the hundreds of dollars we paid for our daughter's birth announcement when she was born almost three years ago.

I guess we are just a little bit smarter the second time around on baby spending.

Do you have any other money saving ideas for that second child?

We're in the final countdown for my son, Lucas Emilio, to arrive. We're all very excited, including my daughter, Ana Isabel.

My wife and I are scrambling. I'm finishing up house projects to get everything ready. My wife is pulling out all the baby stuff. And family members have booked their flights since Carrie Ann has a C-section scheduled.

That brings me to Ana. We have been telling her for months about Lucas' arrival. She's two and a half years old and seems to get it that there will be a new addition to the family.

Still, I don't want her to feel left out. I'm planning on doing more daughter and papi things with her. And we've put aside a few presents for her as well from our generous family, friends and colleagues.

Any other suggestions for keeping the jealous-sibling syndrome at bay? Or should we just be prepared to face it?

I’ve tried to avoid co-sleeping with our kids. Experts say it’s risky (see the American Academy of Pediatrics) and their arguments make sense to me. With our first, Alexander, who’s now almost 2, it wasn’t really necessary. I worked nights and was home and awake at 1 or 2 (or 3) in the morning, so I had some energy to greet an infant at that hour.

Then came Rowan. I now work standard (albeit long) hours during the day, so waking up at 2 a.m. interrupts sleep instead of SportCenter. And we don’t have the same amount of energy as we did with Alexander. Raising two kids under age 2 is exhausting, particularly for my wife, who is breast-feeding.

But I’ve noticed a certain 3-month-old visitor on recent mornings next to me (and hitting me) in bed. He’s joined our bed usually after many hours of failing to get him to stay asleep in his. Relaxed and sleeping peacefully, he looks happy to be there. And I’m happy to see him so at ease – and sound asleep – given how frequently he wakes up at night. In those moments, it seems simple: what’s wrong with co-sleeping?

But then I read what the experts say. And it is sobering. “Several case series of accidental suffocation or death from undetermined cause suggest that bed sharing is hazardous,” an AAP policy statement reads. Well, that’s pretty clear. But I know the advocates of co-sleeping, including good friends of mine, feel that it helps parent-child bonding, breast-feeding and sleep. (See a good summary of the debate.)

Here’s the bottom line: I don’t believe in co-sleeping. But that’s not to say I’ve raised any protests when, after a long night of crying, Rowan has landed next me.

And you?

For months now, Baby has been plucking the batting from under her car-seat cover and stuffing it in her mouth.

We usually find the offending wad once we've reached our destination and have pulled her out of her Graco SnugRide car seat.

Well, lo and behold, other babies have been teetering the choking line by stuffing the batting in their mouths.

Graco announced on its Web site that it will replace the seat covers for select models of the SnugRide made in the U.S. between Aug. 1, 2006 and June 30, 2007.

Read the full statement and request a replacement kit.

If you've stumbled across other recent recalls or product safety warnings chime in!

I’ve just returned from two weeks home on paternity leave with my newborn, Rowan. (By the way, ever notice how rarely you hear that term, “paternity leave”? But that’s for another post.)

Anyway, I’ve learned a crucial lesson: bottles can matter. And I must concede that Rowan is a fan of Dr. Brown’s bottles, which are designed to eliminate air bubbles.

Rowan and I engaged in a feeding standoff for several days during our first week together. He just wouldn’t take the bottle. He would only relent in two situations: 1) When he didn’t realize what he was doing; or 2) When he was just too hungry to fight me anymore.

But, boy, did he fight.

There was a long afternoon at a car dealership when he cried if the bottle got near his mouth. I gave up and walked him to a Home Depot to distract him. He finally took the bottle as we stood in the lighting aisle.

So after the fourth day of this, my wife suggested I try another brand of bottle…

OK, I’ve got to stop here. There is some disagreement in my household about when, and how many times Shola suggested that I try a Dr. Brown’s bottle. She threw out the number “30” in a discussion about how many times she offered this idea. I think there might have been at least one prior mention. Regardless, I’ll accept that perhaps I had ignored some initial prompting.

Anyway, Rowan is a big fan of the Dr. Brown’s bottle. Took to it right away. Maybe he would have given into the other bottle by the fifth day. Our first son took the initial brand of bottle we gave him, and never protested much.

I generally think it’s more the idea of the bottle than the kind of bottle that matters. And from a quick Google search I just did, it’s also important to check out the safety of bottles. I should probably do that myself.

Either way, Rowan finally took the bottle, and life was much easier.

Any of this ring a bell with anyone?

If there were prenatal testing to determine if your child was going to be gay, would you use it? This provocative idea, still a fantasy, is being debated in some Christian and gay circles after the Rev. Albert Mohler, Jr., president of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, wrote about it on his blog last week.

The headline was "Is Your Baby Gay? What if You Could Know? What if You Could Do Something About It?" Mohler said he would approve of an intervention, if someone invented one, to change the baby's sexual orientation in utero if tests showed he or she were going to be gay.

This is interesting because many conservative Christians believe homosexuality is a lifestyle choice, not determined biologically. Mohler said he would not support abortion or gene therapy, but might support something less invasive, like a hormone patch.

Gay rights groups, of course, were infuriated. Harry Knox of the Human Rights Campaign told The Washington Post: "My word for [Christian conservatives] is they should be more focused on repentance for the sins they have committed against homosexuals than on manipulating the next generation of the unborn."