WGN Morning News Blog

Somewhere out there, a skinny 16-year old is holed up in a bedroom adorned with girlie posters and littered with "PC Monthly" magazines. He's feeling proud because he just learned how to hack into the "Technophobes Anonymous" chat room, and he's telling everyone his mom's new blender can parallel park a car. And at some point last night, whether it was before he uncovered the body armor cheat code for Halo 2, or after he consolidated his 12 e-mail accounts, this young punk did it.

He got the best of old Tomasulo.

This is my only explanation for the way my facial hair online vote went down. Certainly, no self-respecting Tomasulo-ite would cast his or her vote for "The Freddie Mercury." There are only two types of people who should be wearing Fu Manchu mustaches- large men who ride Harley Davidson's . . and porn stars who hit their pique in 1973.

So Mr. Cyber-knickers, you did it. You somehow compromised the voting results and made sure "The Freddie Mercury" won. I'm not sure how exactly you did it, nor do I have proof. But that doesn't matter. I'm a man of my word. You thought you could make me look silly, but you can't.

I will rock the Fu Manchu . . . and I will look good.

http://www.myspace.com/pattomasulo

**See Pat have his face shaved LIVE during the WGN Morning News on Tuesday, January 9!

POLL RESULTS
"The Freddie Mercury" (113 responses)
27.9%

"The Maverick" (100 responses)
24.7%

"The Passion of the Tomasulo" (88 responses)
21.7%

"The Jim Rome" (44 responses)
10.9%

"The American Idol" (27 responses)
6.7%

"The Tom Selleck" (21 responses)
5.2%

"The Phil Jackson" (12 responses)
3.0%

405 total responses