Chan Lowe: America's most hated man
You just knew, watching Tony Hayward bobbing and weaving and sliming around at his hearing, that he’d been coached the night before by a murder board of corporate image specialists and tort lawyers, each impersonating a congressman as he fired scattershot questions at him.
“Look contrite,” they admonished Mr. Hair Mousse. “Apologize all over the place that it happened. Take the arrows. Make the martyrdom of St. Sebastian look like a Sunday picnic, but whatever you do, DON’T ADMIT YOU DID ANYTHING WRONG!”
Any such disclosure, any slip into the matter of willful negligence, could mean billions in court. We won’t know anything until the investigations are finished, he said. Blame? Not his province, thank you very much. The matter should be put before an adjudicator.
It’s all a joke because we already know the answer. We’ve heard the testimony about the arguments over whether safety measures should have been taken, or whether the potential damage to BP’s profits was just too heavy to take the trouble.
What do you do with a person who feigns repentance when his heart and mind remain wrapped around the idea of safeguarding the bottom line above all else?
How about some condign punishment? Throw him in a cell lined with defective Chinese drywall, where he can spend the balance of his days inhaling the brimstone-laced fumes of a corporate irresponsibility that he had nothing to do with.
God knows BP’s victims have already been condemned to such a fate.
CHAN LOWE has been the Sun Sentinel’s first and only editorial cartoonist for the past twenty-six years. Before that, he worked as cartoonist and writer for the Oklahoma City Times and the Shawnee (OK) News-Star.
Comments
I think we could probably get the whole corporate penny pinching on safety thing under control with a constitutional amendment mandating fines equal to 10% of the company's gross revenue per day for every day the violation persists. It is unfortunate to clutter up the constitution with something like that, but if it was merely a law, they could buy repeal for much less than the potential fines (and it would have to be based on revenue, not profit, or no one would make a profit - sort of like Hollywood where neither Spiderman nor Lord of the Rings has yet made any profit :-).
Posted by: Tom | June 18, 2010 6:45 PM
The London "Guardian" said, "Mr. Hayward gave the impression that he was the most incompetent CEO in living memory.
In my opinion that's a understatement...
Now that the Supreme Court has deemed corporations to be "people" maybe we should instill the "Corporate Death Penalty" for their killing of our environment. If corporations are entitled to the same rights as citizens, they should be subject to same laws regarding the protection of life and health.
Posted by: Lorraine Wagner | June 19, 2010 11:10 AM
"It’s all a joke because we already know the answer."
Then why bother to have anyone "testify" before Congress. Why bother with anything but getting directly to the criminal trials? Why bother with all the crap about asking BP to do anything to help? They are "guilty" of drilling for oil, with a full government permit, but they lied about everything, so get these lying criminals in court and take all of their assets, sending them into bankruptcy, so Obama can use tax payer money to buy the controlling interest, a la General Motors. Isn't that what is going on here? Chan? Isn't it?
Posted by: Max42 | June 20, 2010 6:19 PM
So, Lorraine Wagner, why did BP have full government permission, with paid up permits, to drill over one mile deep in the Gulf? Did the government experts make a big mistake?
You advocate for the "death penalty". That means you want the US government to expropriate all of BP's assets and what? - run it as a government enterprise - use the funds to pay down the debt? - ensure we never ever drill another oil well in the Western hemisphere?
Just what is it, specifically, you want to happen with the "death penalty"? If you can't answer that, you are just another ill informed person who loves hateful rhetoric. I'd really like to hear your answer.
Posted by: Max42 | June 20, 2010 6:27 PM
The government isn't without mistakes..Obma should've gone after the evil twins Bush/Cheney at the beginning of his administration..
MMS decided to merge it's services with those of oil companies- Letting them fill out inspection reports.
Too late now-
If you notice,the first rule politicans follow is...Don't pick on poor transnational corporations-they may well fund your next election campaign.
Posted by: Lorraine Wagner | June 21, 2010 7:45 AM
Ah, Lorraine, once again you duck the answer to the direct question. And the government "mistake" is "Obama should have gone after the evil twins...."? Gone after them for what? The fact that they didn't define the "corporate death penalty"?
Posted by: Max42 | June 22, 2010 10:47 AM