Holiday wreaths for the fallen

These are CHRISTMAS wreaths, not "holiday" wreaths. No one puts out Christmas wreaths for any other holiday but Christmas. I hope this doesn't hurt the overly sensitive eyes and ears and brains of the Trib censors.

I grant you that they are XMAS wreaths, but please realize that there are heros of all faiths buried at Arlington and other national cemeteries.

So let's see....

The Trib photographer, Pete Souza, has now been to more military funerals than the Commander-in-Chief.

What's wrong with this picture?

On this tread all I will say is RIP Brothers and Sisters. May St Peter know a soldier has reported for duty

To Lefty Kenny: Hold on dearly to your picture of Stalin and think of the good old days.

To my fallen brothers: May you find peace in heaven.

Frank James' War on Christmas; A Fiction

December 24, 2006, 6:00 PM.

As Frank James left the Tribune Tower and walked south on Michigan toward his favorite drinking hole, the No Name Lounge on S. Michgan, the song was still running through his head.

He had Christmas shopping to do, HAD to do, but he needed to knock off the rough edges first. It had been an awful day in the Swamp, and he just couldn't face the hoards of shoppers on N. Michigan in a completely sober state of mind. Frank hated Christmas, in fact. 'Count me a soldier in the Liberal War on Christmas', he thought.

As he worked his way south through the crowded mass of people, a cold, hard rain hit him in the face. The channel 5 weather gal was still teasing a white Christmas, but really, it felt like a warm late March evening. Hadn't seen a real snow on Christmas in years. 'Who can shop for Christmas gifts in this s%$*', he mused. 'No more Marshall Field, no more Carson's. Was it really necessary? Did they really damn well have to do it?'

He had practically begged Mark to come along, and that David character from Connecticut. It wasn't often, anymore, that they were all in town together. "Come on boys! Just one. Im buying?" Mark made up a good excuse about a long drive to Michigan (Say Yes!!) for the holiday weekend, but that David guy just looked at him with a curious expression on his face and slowly shook his head no. 'What's with that guy? Some kind of eastern elitist prick? Why was he even in Chigago. Get the f*%# out, jack ass! Serenity now Frank, serenity now.'

Continuing south, the song re-asserted itself in his mind. 'Stop it!'

As he approached Michigan and Randolph he put his hand into his pocket and palmed a $20 bill. The famous Old Joe 'guy with no legs' was still working the corner after all these years. Joe's cover had been blown back in the 90's, but it didn't bother James. He liked Old Joe. Reminded him of someone. As he passed by he yelled, "Yo! Joe! buddy! Here!", and shoved the $20 into the old man's hand. Ever the professional, Joe muttered "Bless you, Brother. May the Lord be with you." James had a huge chuckle with himself over that one, but he replied, "Bless you too, Bro Joe."

James loved the smell of the city. A perfect blend of sweat, perfume, food, tobacco and bus fumes, illicit sex. Chicago smelled like a city should smell.

It was a bit of a walk to the No Name, but it was worth it, and as he walked past the Art Institute from the West side of Michigan, he looked up at the neo-classical facade and read the names carved into the rock forever; Raphael, Van Gough, Rembrant, and Botticelli; 'The bonfire of the vanities lives', he thought as he pushed in the door of the No Name bar and sat down at his usual place. "Frank!", some smart ass yelled. James grinned and gave him the finger.

"Gin martini very very dry, straight up, Sandi." Sandi nodded and walked back toward the other end of the bar to make his drink. She knew exactly what he wanted. The order was just a formality. Frank slyly apprised her form, thinking she had no clue. Men always think this.

As he looked deep down into his $12 drink, wondering how he could slip two on to his expense voucher, he took account of his day in the Swamp and there was the song again. 'Please stop. Please?'

* * * *

Frank drank down the martini in one sweet, rewarding chug, caught Sandi's eye and pointed to his glass with a look of urgency. 'This'll kill it!', he thought.

The Swamp; Today's main subject; "The Liberal War on Christmas, or The Conservative Jihad on the Holidays?" The first two to post were, of course Bruce and John E. How did they do it? How did they continue to crank this stuff out in every post, day after day? Did they eat, sleep, work, go to a movie, ever?? Did they really hate eachother?

The base of James's neck was experiencing a marvelous tingle, and the bar noise and sweet electric blues track really sounded great. He took another good drink and gave a familiar wink in Sandi's direction. She returned his wink with a disapproving half smile, then produced drink no. three.

Then old Dale reported in, somehow linking it all to the plight of vets and their VA bennies. Got to hand it to that guy; he believes in something with a passion. 'You go buddy', thought James.

Then came the long 'thought pieces' from RRD, tom, Tom O, Bill, little t tom, Dienne, Janet, Ms. Lizzy and all the other 'Johns', Juanito and the rest. And all this, sprinkled with comments from Jethro, a song or two from 'Mr.Morris', Jack and Bubba, Bill r, unlettered, maybe. These guys were always 'spitting in the soup'. There it was again, the awful tune.

Then, around 2PM, in time to make the final late afternoon cut, 'Neutral Lady' submitted a long fiction called, 'Christmas 1968; A Free Fire Zone Celebration' in which ALL the Swamp Rats become collateral damage casualties when a napalm strike goes haywire in the Iron Triangle. 'How's she even know about that crap?' She told a weird tale of what everyone thought about from the first moment of fiery pain until unconsciousness set in........crikey, mate.

And finally the cold, hard, remorseless JD would post. Was JD really John D? John E thought so, but not John or john f!

By now the wonderful tingling had reached the top of Frank's head, and he could bring himself to consider the last post received that day. His stomach jumped and the tingle faded as he thought of the awful, disgusting, sickeningly sweet, uncalled for, off subject posting he had finally, against his better judgement,,,,,allowed. Was the poster being sardonic, sarcastic, ironic, stupid?

James's realized he HAD to go Christmas shopping NOW. He slugged down the final, fifth glass of nearly pure gin, made a show of leaving Sandi her tip though she didn't seem to notice, and staggered through the door this time heading back North on Michigan.

The hard rain had turned into a harder freezing rain, and had switched to the North, so now he had to take it full in the face.

He made it past Legless Old Joe and as far as the newspaper kiosk, now closed, at Randolph Street and realized he could not go on. Had to sit down. There was a small space between the kiosk and the Cultural Building that looked big enough for shelter. James's staggered toward it. The last thing he remembered was seeing the blurry lights of a Christmas decoration on a corner street light.

************

Old Joe had called it a day, and it had been a good one. Joe had Christmas shopping to do for his grandson. He stood up and briskly walked around the corner turning west on Randolph, thinking about dinner, when he suddenly stopped. He spotted an indistinct form sprawled out on a pile of old newspapers next to the old library building. 'Oh, that ain't good, fella.' He reached into James's pocket, and pulled out his wallet. 'Merry Christmas mofo!!'

*************

At 2:00 AM on December 25, 2006, Frank James slowly regained consciousness.
There was a song running through his head.
'Thanks a lot Morris. Merry Christmas, you idiot!!'

Why do birds
Suddenly appear?
Everytime you are near
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Why do stars
Fall down from the sky?
Everytime you walk by
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

On the day that you were born
The angels got together and decided
To create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moondust in your hair
Of gold and starlight in your eyes of blue

That is why all the girls in town
Follow you all around
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Woo... close to you...

They are indeed Christmas wreaths - but in such a place, does it really matter what they're called? It's a beautiful gesture and sign of respect for those who've truly given all. May they rest in peace.

Little Johnny,

It sounds like you're upset that your expletive laced posts are getting dumped.

If you want to attack someone at least have the balls to use your own post name,not one you made up,you loser.

R I P ,to our American Hero's.

JohnD,
One should never miss an opportunity to propogandize the "War on Christmas", even if it might diminish Wreaths Across Americas effort to honor the supreme sacrifice these soldiers have made.

Nice story telling there, Neutral Lady. Got a kick out of it!!

Vito,

That far left is actually right -- it's a continuum.

I just think the man (and yes he IS just a man) who sent them into harm's way should pay his respects as should we all.

I am with you Linda, nice gesture for men who were brave and caring enough to go and fight for their family and America.
This Christmas is the saddest for me as i see a lot of good values slipping away to hateful words and selfishness.
I would not want to have the season if it were not for jesus, but then, Jesus is the reason for the season.
God is love, Jesus is his love toward us.
sit back and enjoy.

Most people leave wreaths up for the winter holidays.

Everyone be sure to raise a glass to neutral lady this season. Excellent, as always.

I always liked the Circle Jerks version better though.

Always interesting that several blabbers on this site who constantly worry about Todd Stroger,become silent when we discuss the war's dead.

In their little fantasy world,idealism overcomes realty.

25,000 dead and wounded for what?

I took part in the wreath-laying at Arlington National Cemetey today. The Christmas wreaths were only placed on the graves of Christian soldiers. We were explicity asked by ANC officials, not to place Christmas wreaths on graves marked with a Star of David. Perhaps that makes Larry feel better.

Despite the ridiculousness of hyper-sensitive readers and the MSM, EVERY grave was honored today -- those with Christmas wreaths, and those without.

One more thing, this act of respect had nothing to do with politics. I was so pleased not to hear any talk of political parties, political ideology or debate about war policies. The cars of the volunteers sported every kind of cause you can imagine. But that did not affect the cooperation and camaraderie we felt in being able to honor America's heroes. Too bad we can't do that more often.

This wreath company from downeast Maine has been sending 5000 wreaths, gratis, shipping paid, to Arlington every year since what, 1992? Why has it taken the MSM all this time to notice it? Perhaps because it's good news?

Nice one, Neutral L.

Keep your gin cold and your back to the wind.

Just a thought, and a counterpoint to 'Imagine'.

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
Ans so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear
And so this is Christmas
For weak and for strong
For rich and the poor ones
The world is so wrong
And so happy Christmas
For black and for white
For yellow and red ones
Let's stop all the fight
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear
And so this is Christmas
And what have we done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
Ans so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear
War is over over
If you want it
War is over
Now...

Bub says,
"I always liked the Circle Jerks version better though.
Posted by: Bubba | Dec 14, 2006 3:21:49 PM"

I just gave myself sternum damage.

What do you people smoke in east tater?

"I am with you Linda, nice gesture for men who were brave and caring enough to go and fight for their family and America.
This Christmas is the saddest for me as i see a lot of good values slipping away to hateful words and selfishness.
I would not want to have the season if it were not for jesus, but then, Jesus is the reason for the season.
God is love, Jesus is his love toward us.
sit back and enjoy.
Posted by: Proud conservative | Dec 14, 2006 3:04:44 PM"

Linda, You need to beware who might agree with you.

PC,
'Pride comes before the fall.'
'Pride is the first deadly sin, and the root of all the others.'

Sit back and enjoy?

So let's see....

The Trib photographer, Pete Souza, has now been to more military funerals than the Commander-in-Chief.

What's wrong with this picture?

Posted by: Kenny Bunkport | Dec 14, 2006 1:45:15 PM

Can you prove that?

How many military funerals have you attended?

Stan,

W's attendance issue has been reported on extensively in several interviews, but I'll guess you'll take the word of Stars & Stripes:

http://stripes.com/article.asp?section=104&article=37535&archive=true

Stan,

W's attendance issue has been reported on extensively in several interviews, but I'll guess you'll take the word of Stars & Stripes:

Posted by: Kenny Bunkport | Dec 14, 2006 8:11:28 PM

I read the article. I'm surprised and I stand corrected.

neutral l-

is this a DC forum or the ratty couch in the corner of your creative writing classroom?

I give you a d on that one, since by posting it you're clearly asking for it to be graded, whether it be through complements or criticisms. I give a d because it was too long and it really didn't have a point.

It was the verbal equivalent of modern art, as in the "painters" who take different brushes laden with different colors of paint and slag it onto a huge canvas to the tune of some pop-relevant melody.

Of course, as in all art, any judgement of it can only be one of opinion.

Keep the pen to paper if you really have something to say.

CM,

Not the place for it here. Check Sweet Home.

James,

Stick around, this will all make more sense after a while.

NPR did a nice piece about this on the 12th. Check their archives.

"Keep the pen to paper if you really have something to say.

Posted by: James | Dec 14, 2006 11:14:32 PM"

James,

Come on.
NL sends us funny, sad, ironic stories now and then. Did you see her 'On the Hunt with Psycho Man' story a few weeks back?

I say we take an informal poll;

Do you like NL's Xmas tale?

Yes ✔
No

Merry,
You had to be told not to lay Christian symbols on non-Christian soldiers graves

james

my couch is perfectly respectable.

Neutral Lady-you're money! Your Christmas tale was great. I give James a D-for d-----b-g.

Cat.
looks like James stepped in it.

By my count the poll stands at;

(Do you like NL's Xmas tale?)

Yes ✔✔✔✔
No ✔

Neutral Lady,

No neutrality from me on this issue, You Rock? Scrooge james needs to lighten-up and smell the prose. You go girl!

Neutral Girl,

Good story,well done.

john e,

Didn't NL 'pink mist' you in a story?
Now she has me driving FJ 'insane in the brain'.

Sweet!

I liked N.L's story, so count me as a yea vote.
Thanks for the story, N.L.

By my count the poll stands at;

(Do you like NL's Xmas tale?)

Yes ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔☺
No ✔☹

That's the final count, though I am still trying to figure out it john e voted twice!

james,
We are just funnin' around. ✌

NL doesn't seem to be a self promoter, or too talkative, but I spent some time in the archive and found her last major story;

Sep22 archive;
' Musharraf Book' blog
On the Hunt with Psycho Man'

Can't find the others.

Isn't it ironic how quietly the fallen lay so that we may babble...

Honor, Duty, Respect are the very words used by all of my heros...soldiers, policemen, firemen, teachers and preachers...

RIP MY brothers and Sisters.