The Final Score

You know there's something wrong with the world when you pull into a gas station and one of the guys at the Beerz & Gunz mart comes running out and tells you to hold off on filling up until he can raise the prices on the pump.

In case you're wondering, the very same gasoline that we're guzzling on LI costs about 50 cents a gallon less in Texas and Oklahoma and at least a quarter less in Arkansas, North Carolina, Virginia and New Jersey.

Hey, it's great to be back in the Land of $4.32 a Gallon. I can understand why Jim decided to run from Yankee Stadium to Shea between games. Between gas and parking, he probably saved a fortune.

I cannot accept Anthony's challenge to run from the Pizza Hut on Route 110 to the California Pizza Kitchen at the Walt Whitman Mall because the Pizza Hut has been torn down. I will, however, run from the CPK to the mall's Starbucks if I get the right sponsor.

I won't bore you with vacation trip tales, but here's some food for thought:

1. You've got to be crazy to sit out in the sun during a Texas Rangers day game when it's 97 degrees. And when I say you, I mean me.

2. Dear Jack in the Box: Please come back to New York. We miss you.

3. I think that the guys who answer the call buttons at Sonic Drive-Ins are trained to intentionally goof up the order of anyone with New York plates.

4. A list of edible things that woke me up during my visit to Mrs. Norm's family farm in beautiful downtown Middle-of-Nowhere Oklahoma:

A. Roosters who don't understand the "only at daybreak" concept.

B. A choir of insane gobbling turkeys

C. The cow (above).

5. The National Hot Dog and Sausage Council's ballpark hot dog rankings noted in Anthony's earlier entry is just plain loony.

How can anyone in their right mind vote for Wrigley Field hot dogs? Even Cub fans don't like Wrigley Field hot dogs. A lot of them save their hot dog eating for drunken pilgrimages to U.S. Cellular Field. Fenway Franks are kind of raunchy, too. I'm good with Yankee Stadium and Dodger Dogs being high on the list, but the bratwursts in Milwaukee are the best of all. Comments?